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I don't understand

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how fuck does he manage it? not talk to him for 9 months or so and yet he can still fucking get to me like this. I dunno if i should be worried or angry. What if it happens. What if he's not bull shitting this time. How am i gonna take that. It will make me more suicidal than ever, i know it. I dunno how to react, im just sitting here in fucking tears, feeling so low, so tired, so ..... alone. I just wanna sleep forever. Im gonna sleep forever.


I don't understand.
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