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I Don't Understand...

Discussion in 'Rants, Musings and Ideas' started by DepressedFemale, Nov 8, 2006.

  1. OK, what I'm about to describe is not the main reason I have come onto this website, I'm afraid I haven't had time to tell about myself yet - being a busy student.

    Me and my mum haven't been getting on well recently. In fact, for ages we haven't been getting on. But recently, it's got so much worse. I used to think mum was the best person in the world and I could approach her with anything. Now we hardly ever speak.

    Tonight started off good, mum had some friends round and they drank and had a laugh, and i socialised with them a bit. But then when they left mum started getting roudy with my sensitive little sister. So i stick up for her. Mum starts saying 'well your a little bitch aint ya? no one in the family likes you' I knew the was drunk so i tried to ignore the comment and went on to do my homework.

    Later on, i saw her giving me an evil look. I asked her why she's giving that evil, then she asked why I was giving her an evil look. I ignored her and went on with my homework, then she got angry and stood up, starting walking over to me shouting, 'you little fucker, fucking 15 hours of labour... blah blah blah' and she slapped me across the arm and started shaking me. I held her still and she took it as me hitting her. she said 'your a little fucking bitch you are' and hit me really hard on my arm.

    I'm not used to my mum hitting me. Last time she did was when i was about 4. now 18, I thought my mum would give me more respect. Obviously not.

    I feel so neglected within this house, the negative things coming from mum isn't helping one bit whilst trying to do my a levels...

    i feel so alone people
  2. tabby

    tabby Active Member

    Was your mom drunk at the time she was hitting you? It took me a few times to figure out what she meant by "15 hours of labor", and I'm really suprised that your mother could bring up such a horrible thing, and to see you in such a way. If she hasn't been like this before, I don't think she really meant to hurt you. I'm also glad you stopped her from physically hurting you, and not retaliating to cause more problems. Is there anyway you can contact somebody, the authorities maybe if she continues to behave this way? I hope your mom gets the help she needs, and that you and your sister will keep safe. Wish you the best.
  3. DarnTired

    DarnTired Antiquitie's Friend

    Good lord.

    Someone in your extended family needs to know about this. Aunts, Uncles? Is there anyone you can go to?

    Maybe you should go to someone in authority, but I have no idea who. Maybe someone else on this forum has better ideas (I've only just joined two weeks ago).
  4. thank you so much for your reply, it means so much to me

    authority? i didn't think it was that serious. and no, there isn't a soul on earth i can talk to except my boyfriend (who is the only person keeping me out of suicidal feelings) and he cant do anything. thats the reason i joined this website, to try and convey my feelings to a more understandable audience.

    my mother is someone suffering from chronic depression anyway, maybe that fuelled it?

    it just seems everything is my fault nowadays.

    dad just came downstairs and told me aggressively to stay away from my mum, i dont even know what i done except held her back when she tried to hit me. i just feel like dying right now, the only person keeping me on this planet is my boyfriend and my little sister. i cant leave them.
    Last edited by a moderator: Nov 8, 2006

  5. Thanks for your reply.
    Yeah she was drunk when she hit me, she keeps reminding me of her '15 hours of labour' sarcastically all the time. My mum does need psychological help, she lost babies before and it's fucked her up. She won't see anyone, she refuses any help. The same way she tells me to refuse any treatment like anti-depressants. It makes me feel like I'm really not worth '15 hours of labour'. Like she went through all that pain and the outcome wasn't something of love. I don't know... I haven't spoken or seen her since though, and I intend to avoid her in any way.
  6. TLA

    TLA Antiquitie's Friend

    I am very sorry to hear of your stuggling and painful home life.
    I too tried to take care of my younger sister when I went away to college. We both tuned out allright, despite the pitiful sh** that we had.:eek:hmy:

    Also drink will cause the depression worse and to say things that she will be sorry for. (maybe not?).

    Try not to take her hurtful words to heart, 20 yrs. later you will remember it.
    In one ear, out the other.
    keep posting,