I have suffered with depression & suicidal thoughts pretty much my entire adulthood. Recently things have take a drastic turn for the worse. I make good money at my job but I am so far in debt (credit cards) that I can no longer pay my monthly bills. Talked to a bankruptcy attorney. Since the laws changed, it a lot harder to qualify. My parents filed in June. Nice huh? All because of this bitch spawn of Satan that has taken my parents for all they are worth. Literally. My dad, well, he has pretty much given up on life. Has super high blood pressure but won't take medication for it. He thinks they only way out is he dies or she dies. Fuck that! But see I can't make my parents do anything. But who is there to help them out when the need it. Me. But now I am going under too. I can't change the past. Maybe I will get the guts someday to actually do something. My Mom is my best friend. She still has some "sane-ness" in her. She doesn't want to die. She is a two time survivor of breast cancer & the strongest person I know. I love her with all my heart. If she ever gets to that breaking point, maybe we can do a mother-daughter type thing........... Thanks for listening to my rant.............. I have said this before, I am not looking for pity, understanding, or even help. I just want to be acknowledged. I want someone to just say "I know you are hurting......." crying now. I better go.