I don't want to live anymore....

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by depressedGirl, Jun 5, 2009.

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  1. depressedGirl

    depressedGirl Well-Known Member

    First of all I am supposed to go and see the psychiatrist but I go to the wrong place.
    Then the counsellor annoys me because she thinks I want to be depressed. I am giving up on her. She's only saying that because she knows she can't help me. I am always going to be depressed. I hate life and she knows it. Suicide is the only way out...

    The other main thing that upsets me more then anything is the fact is I have black hair and I don't want it black anymore. I want it a dark blood red. But NO!!! Life sucks again.
    I ask the hair dressers but all they say is that my hair is too dark.

    Everything is going wrong and I don't want to live anymore. I am considering ending everything because I cannot take anymore. There is no hope anymore.
  2. Petal

    Petal SF dreamer Staff Member Safety & Support SF Supporter

    Hi Della :hug:

    Perhaps its time to change your counsellor? Don't give up on counselling completely hun because it can help you a great deal when you find the right one for you..

    As for your hair, you don't need to get a hairdresser to do it. You can use those extreme colour dyes, they should do the job :dunno:

    Don't give up hun, you'd be missed way too much :arms:
  3. orangejulius

    orangejulius Well-Known Member

    Don't change your hair color... I've always considered black hair to be the most attractive hair color on a women. It's exotic and can be a beautiful contrast to your skin. An example is Karen O of the Yeah Yeah Yeahs... So amazing.

    As for your counselor, dump her and get another. If she isn't willing to help, then she is worthless to you.
  4. triggs

    triggs Account Closed

    hey hun, i'm sorry things aren't working out. you should change your counsellor if she's not helping you. don't lose faith in therapy though, it can help a lot. :hug:
    and if you get different opinions from different hairdressers then you should get what you want. i dyed my hair black and i didn't want it anymore so my hairdresser stripped it, using a chemical thing and then dyed it afterwards. it does damage your hair though so you have to be really sure about it. i know if i had the choice to go back i wouldn't dye my hair at all, i'd keep it natural.
    anyway hun, just keep safe and stay strong. we're thinking of you :smile:
    laura xx
  5. justafool

    justafool Well-Known Member

    It might really help if you did change your looks to something that is more pleasing to you (I say this even though I really, really like black hair). It seems like you give up a little too easily on things (so do I, sometimes). Just don't back down on stuff that is important to you.
  6. mdmefontaine

    mdmefontaine Antiquities Friend

    della hun. . . i've been thinking about you.

    don't give up sweetie. you are too dear . . .

    i am sure you are beautiful with any color of hair. but try to find what pleases you.

    definitely find a new counselor.
    no matter what, you are worth it. you deserve to be happy, and we all care about you love
  7. depressedGirl

    depressedGirl Well-Known Member

    I know I should find a new counsellor but that's the only one there I think. I will ask. Thanks for your help. I did try suicide and failed AGAIN!!! grr
  8. Neal Perry

    Neal Perry Account Closed

    I have had 8 counselors in the last 12 years. Not one of them has ever done me a damn bit of good. I had a counselor tell me he wouldn't treat me if I kept cutting myself....so I stopped seeing him. What a brilliant stratagy he had.

    I will say that most of the time counseling has not worked for me is because I am not open enough. I refuse to discuss the real root of my problems.

    My last counselor convinced me that no one had the right to treat me badly, and that I should stand up for myself. I had a good job the last 10 years the only problem was most of the staff didn't like me. I did a dumb thing and called them out on it....I lost my job.

    I haven't given up on counseling. In my heart I know there is someone out there who can help me. The question is will I meet them before I complete suicide.

    Dying your hair isn't permanent so I say go for it. It may help and if it doesn't no real harm done.

    I can tell you the only thing that keeps me from actually killing myself is that I don't want to abandon my cat. Find one thing you want to live for or one thing that can't live without you and hang on to it.
    Last edited by a moderator: Jun 6, 2009
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