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I feel bad for my parents

Discussion in 'Rants, Musings and Ideas' started by wastedmylife, Jan 26, 2009.

  1. wastedmylife

    wastedmylife Well-Known Member

    I destroyed my life for my deep insecurity that they probably posess to

    they never wanted me to have a lousy life, they just didnt know any better, I forgive them because they were probably going through the same thing I am going through

    Do I get revenge?

    I feel bad for them, now I am a burden, before I was the strong one and they didnt have to worry about me, now they will worry about me until the day I die because I am the burden and I am the failure

    I wish my parents were dead for the simple sense I wish they didnt have to see the failure I have become, If I am going to live I have to reinvent myself and become a new person, I cant believe what I did to my life
    Last edited by a moderator: Jan 26, 2009
  2. ergo51

    ergo51 Well-Known Member

    Would the revenge help you, in a practical way, to get your life together?

    It could possibly make you feel better in an emotional way, that is to say, there that's showed the ******* they won't **** with me again.

    Fair enough that could make you feel better, fleetingly, but then again you'd also have to live with the knowledge that you'd been dragged down to their level.

    Maybe you're beyond caring?

    Surely in the long run though that emotion is going to lead to further feelings of the need to take revenge?

    Being crossed is hard to take. Being irreversibly ****** over by people especially when you're older is almost impossible to take and I don't sit on a philisophical cloud here, I know exactly how it feels.

    Or maybe I've read you wrong?

    I dunno, but I do know that taking revenge is pretty futile.

    Getting your self back together is gonna be better, and I don't mean as an act of revenge (as in the best way to get back at people is to have a good life) I just mean getting yourself back together. Just for you.

    Just my thoughts, if they're wide of the mark, apologies.
  3. wastedmylife

    wastedmylife Well-Known Member

    my life is destroyed, i have physical problems that are horrific to live with

    revenge is needed in certain situations, my heart and conciense are telling me I need to get revenge and perhaps kill people however there is something in my head telling me not to

    I will never get back together, I will just survive until I die, not sure if that is living though
  4. ergo51

    ergo51 Well-Known Member

    Well I'm glad there is something in your head telling you not to, when a mind is telling its owner not to overstep the mark it should be listened to. Again no philisophical cloud here I've overstepped the mark myself and ignored the voice that said stop now (I'd like to blame cocaine antidepressants and booze but it was me that did it really) and I live, uncomfortably, with the consequences.

    I find it hard to comment on your physical disabilities as I don't have any, it's beyond my sphere of experience.

    The one thing I would say is you have your mind, but then again if someone said that to me and I was disabled I'd feel like kicking them.

    I'd still like to believe there is a way through though, somehow.

    As ever, take care.
  5. mdmefontaine

    mdmefontaine Antiquities Friend

    hi. i feel sorry that you are in such great pain. you sound like a really loving person. but i think you are blaming yourself too much.

    your parents most likely love you just the way you are. of course they dont' want you to have a 'lousy' life. i am not sure of your physical limitations. i, at this time, have no experience there. (however, i am sure i have always been a failure in my parents eyes. a class A F*** up. )

    hurting your parents or trying to 'exact revenge' would not solve anything. i think your heart is good - and if you did something like that - you would hurt and grieve afterward.

    reaching out here is a positive thing. it shows that you are wanting to move past this. to heal. to reach out w/hope. we all are in the same boat here, in that regard. stay here with us. don't make any decisions now. definitely when you are in pain is NOT a good time for decisions. pm me anytime you want to talk - or there are others here that you can pm as well. i care what happens. . . .. :hug:
  6. Dave_N

    Dave_N Guest

    You've mentioned repeatedly on this site that you want revenge on the people that helped put you in the position that you're in. You've also mentioned that you would like to go on a killing spree to enact your revenge on them. But seriously, will killing these people really bring satisfaction to your life? Also, how have these people contributed to your problems? I think I recall you mentioning an ill fated football game when things started going downhill. But what have these people done to deserve death?
  7. wastedmylife

    wastedmylife Well-Known Member

    I wouldnt kill random people, just more of a society thing, people who are corrupt and evil perhaps who led me to the shape I am in, there are alot of people who fit this mold, if things were different and if people werent corrupt and evil I wouldnt be in the shape I am in, I know that for a fact
  8. soliloquise

    soliloquise Well-Known Member

    we all have people who are directly or indirectly involved in our situations, pain etc... the best thing you can do is stop saying you cant change it and to try everything within your power to sort yourself out. you say you have no insurance.. then try for medicaid. if they refuse try charities etc... there is help out there you just got to access it and make that effort. i know the situation in the usa for health is shit and i am verylucky here in the UK for health care but the usa does have charities and stuff. same with your housing situation. taking out others is not your right to do. your only duty is to try to improve your life and make a difference. you got to try to do something about this...