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I feel content

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by Wonderment, Dec 13, 2015.

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  1. Wonderment

    Wonderment Member

    I'm not sure why, but over the last 5 or 6 months I've just felt very at ease and content. I feel pretty satisfied with what I've accomplished in life so far with regards to bettering myself, and yet I don't want to live anymore. I feel like there's nothing more for me to do.

    I had previously had severe depression and suicidal thoughts for 3-4 years, but now I don't feel sad at all. I also used to have extreme anxiety and panic attacks almost every day, but I got rid of those through meditation.

    I thought the suicidal thoughts would go away with the negative feelings, but they aren't, and now it seems as though I'm just waiting until a good day comes along.
  2. cymbele

    cymbele SF Supporter

    Welcome to SF
    Glad you are feeling content. At times I feel the same way. The only thing is when we get depressed we cultivate habits of thoughts and even when I am content I still feel like I want to check out. But I have two cats that need someone to take care of them so I have to exist even though I don't want to. I still have to fight the habit of these thoughts every day.
    Something occurred to me. You said you've accomplished much in your life and there's nothing more to do. Try to find a goal whether it is bettering yourself or trying to help someone else. This forum is wonderful for that and you will find that you do make a difference and that it gives you something to live for.
  3. robroy

    robroy Well-Known Member

    Hey wonderment welcome to the forum, I'm glad to see your feeling less sad. I've noticed that even in moments when I'm not really feeling sad I still often have suicidal thoughts just out of habit I think so you're not alone. I think that's normal and is only a problem if it actually feels like suicide is a solution, which it isn't. Please reach out if your feeling down or need to talk with someone:)
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