So recently I was raped by my friends ex- boyfriend. I met him the first few weeks of college and all was well. Then i got in a fight with my own boyfriend and broke up with him. To comfort me, my rapist offered to take me out for coffee: I agreed. He took me to his house saying he forgot his card and asked if i wanted to go inside rather than wait in the hot car. Me being stupidly trusting: agreed to go inside. Im sure you all can see where this went from there. I feel so dirty... so gross and defiled. I mean i wasn't a virgin, but still. Being hit and thrown around and used like that... I have nightmares every night... I wont let my boyfriend (I got back with him later on) touch me because he deserves better... I avoid human contact at all costs, all i want to do is cry and sleep... I feel Disgusting. I guess what i need to know is what i'm doing wrong? Poll below.