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I feel I've ruined my chances at love....

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#21
Work on it with your therapist, don't stop until you feel you have all the skills learned that you need to have to get through this. I have personally been through awful break ups, they are hard but you will find yourself again out in the sea filled with fish, so many partners you could have if you could keep your head above the water and ride through this, good luck - keep working on your self esteem. You will find the right match eventually. 💞
I feel I’ll be suffering like this till I’m 50. In a failure....
 

Gonz

Under Cardiac Arrest
#22
Interesting.....something else I want to add (I am definetly guilty of this) is that I feel jealous when I see my younger roomates (18) getting along with their boyfriends and having the time of their lives. I feel like I'm missing out....
I get that. It's frustrating to be around people who have what you feel you’re lacking. That’s natural. But I can pretty much guarantee that by the time those roommates hit 21, those relationships will have ended. And by that time, so long as you don’t get too fixated on what you don’t have right now, you will be on to the next one (Or maybe even the next one after that, if the next one gets boring).
 
#23
I get that. It's frustrating to be around people who have what you feel you’re lacking. That’s natural. But I can pretty much guarantee that by the time those roommates hit 21, those relationships will have ended. And by that time, so long as you don’t get too fixated on what you don’t have right now, you will be on to the next one (Or maybe even the next one after that, if the next one gets boring).
You're funny, in that you make me laugh (happy laugh) also your profile pic is special
 

Callousgirl

Semper Occultus
#25
I am 21 and I have never had a stable relationship. On top of this, and having gone through my wort break up yet, I have this toxic habit of comparing myself to my two roomates, who are both 18 and are in seemingly healthy relationships. They both have boyfriends they love and I'm sitting here feeling guilty, like I'm missing out and is incapable of love.....what's wrong with me....am I doomed?
Question we have to ask, what is a stable relationship. Your saying your two 18 year old roommates have boyfriends, but, they really do not have a wish or thoughts of their boyfriends will turn into a husband and wife relationship. My theory of a stable relationship, is being with someone for two years, and it is rational to say it can lead to a marriage.

I am 29 years old, and if I was looking for a boyfriend: I would be more interested in a man who has gone months and maybe years without a girlfriend. Reason being, I would find him to be a more secure man because he has been alone. You can find a boyfriend someday, and I think he will find you more interesting and more secure as a woman because you never been with a collections of past boyfriends and a need to have a boyfriend.

We know the women who have a collections of boyfriends on their cellphone, and it is a Monday, and she is unsure who she is going on a date of Friday. Yes she is popular, but, to be frank she is also very insecure. Yes, your feeling insecure because you do not have a boyfriend now. Still, when you do get a boyfriend, he would think of you as a secure woman. Because he will feel you want him as a boyfriend, not because he feels you need to have a boyfriend. There is a difference.
 
#26
Question we have to ask, what is a stable relationship. Your saying your two 18 year old roommates have boyfriends, but, they really do not have a wish or thoughts of their boyfriends will turn into a husband and wife relationship. My theory of a stable relationship, is being with someone for two years, and it is rational to say it can lead to a marriage.

I am 29 years old, and if I was looking for a boyfriend: I would be more interested in a man who has gone months and maybe years without a girlfriend. Reason being, I would find him to be a more secure man because he has been alone. You can find a boyfriend someday, and I think he will find you more interesting and more secure as a woman because you never been with a collections of past boyfriends and a need to have a boyfriend.

We know the women who have a collections of boyfriends on their cellphone, and it is a Monday, and she is unsure who she is going on a date of Friday. Yes she is popular, but, to be frank she is also very insecure. Yes, your feeling insecure because you do not have a boyfriend now. Still, when you do get a boyfriend, he would think of you as a secure woman. Because he will feel you want him as a boyfriend, not because he feels you need to have a boyfriend. There is a difference.
I agree with this. Hopping straight from one relationship into another is bad news. Best to be single and, when you start dating someone, take it slow.
 

Callousgirl

Semper Occultus
#27
I agree with this. Hopping straight from one relationship into another is bad news. Best to be single and, when you start dating someone, take it slow.
@Lady Wolfshead

The problem when you want to date someone who has always had a boyfriend or a girlfriend, and really never been single as a teenager and into adulthood. The longer you are in the relationship with the person, and, the person is getting older as the relationship is lasting years. In my judgment, the person becomes more trapped into the relationship. If a woman, she will do anything to stay in the relationship. If a man, he could become abusive and force her to stay in the relationship. With divorce happening in half the marriages, it is best to find someone that can function and move on if and only if the relationship comes to a end.
 
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