Hello everyone...first post. Basically I have a question (or a statement?), as I am wondering if other people out there feel or have felt the same way. So...I was once a very outgoing person with what I thought to be a lot of self confidence, and a great sense of humour. I liked to have a good time and had tons of great friendships/relationships; I was going to school, and I had a lot of dreams and plans for my future. Then over a period of about two years I just slowly fell into the depression hole. School was the first to suffer and it became an epic struggle in my life until I decided to end it with 12 credits left! Then the friendships went, because I feel like such a failure with school/life and have isolated myself away from the world. Even those who have hung on and try to carry on with me (awesome, understanding people) are being pushed away because I am so embarrassed by my existence these past few years. On top of all this I have dealt with self harm, and issues with alcohol, all of this pretty much in the secrecy of my own little world. Recently I have had to move back in with my parents, after being completely independent since I was 17! I have completely killed any self esteem I may have once had. Effectively what I’m trying to get at is that I feel like whoever I once was is dead, like I have killed whoever I use to be. That is horrific. Anyone feel that way? Bah...I just needed to get that out because I miss having ‘a life’ and not this numb disaster where I, a 24 year old guy, barely leave the house. Life is difficult and i don't know who I am anymore.