i feel like im having another breakdown.

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by kote, Sep 10, 2011.

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  1. kote

    kote Account Closed

    i feel like im having another breakdown.
    not much else to say apart from im pulling everyone down with me.
    i dont feel i can survive this one - not one more trip through hell.
    im very suicidal - but dont have any effective methods anymore so im trapped.
    i feel it was triggered by the lithium - it gave me my life back but i turned to alcohol. i need to see my dr. asap!!!
    nothing more to say as im too depressed.
  2. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

    Hi you i do hope you get into see your doctor asap I hope you get medication changed perhaps and you can get off alcohol as well Keep reaching out okay don't try to fight it alone hugs
  3. bluewail

    bluewail Well-Known Member

    make a doctors appointment now! and don't stop talking and hole yourself up on your own, talk to anyone, on here or anyone around you. i'm sure you're not dragging anyone down with you, people around you are there to help.
  4. kote

    kote Account Closed

    i can see my dr. on tuesday.
    ive managed to decrease my support network.
    trying to start a fight with my brother in law.
    ive still got my sister in law but that will be very icey too.
    alcohol is evil!!! my brother in law saved my life when i had an OD.
    look how i pay him back!!!
    i have to fight till tuesday!!!
    im all alone right now - my wife is at volley ball and i just cant face the extended family.
    i know with what ive got an od will just damage me so its not even an option.
    so im trapped in my shame. my dr can help but not until tuesday.
    i feel everything is fallen apart including my marriage - im keeping an escape plan in mind but i cant live without my diabetes meds or cope with my head meds. i just feel like running and hiding!!!
  5. Speedy

    Speedy Staff Alumni

    Neanderthal.. :hug:

    One of the nicest people I've met here. :) Sorry to hear you're dealing with so much at the moment. I'm here to support. With caring....Mr. A
  6. kote

    kote Account Closed

    thank you for the compliment - but its far from deserved.
    i think the best option is to medicate myself i.e double up so i can sleep through until tuesday and not feel anxious about being dumb.
    i wont post again today there are far more deserving people needing the headline. thank you all for your kind thoughts and time and effort.
  7. Speedy

    Speedy Staff Alumni

    Take good care. :hugtackles:
  8. kote

    kote Account Closed

    the meds havent worked and a dont dare take anymore.
    huh sounds very silly from someone suicidal - but its the worst way to go!!!
    i feel like i need a drink strongly but nothing good comes from that either.
    i feel beaten!!!
    where do i turn to?
    i admit im sick and im wrong - i just cant get the real help i need until tuesday.
  9. kote

    kote Account Closed

    just got back from my wizard of a dr.
    he gave me something that if i drink alcohol i feel extremely sick and wouldnt want any more.
    so even if i get the shakes i couldnt drink. now that how i like it the hard way.
    just goes to show if you dont ask you dont get.
    also had 2 anti anxiety injections and a drip. clears my system completely.
  10. cutiepie132

    cutiepie132 Well-Known Member

    You can't drink when your depressed, that's what happened when I overdosed weeks ago.. If your depressed anyways, the alcohol can make you suicidal.

    As far as nervous breakdowns, been there, did that, like quite a few times. When I go through that, I can't deal with stress, my anxiety is way out of control, then I end up suicidal. But lexapro calmed that down last time it happened to me. So if it ever happens again, I know what to take.

    Hope you feel better..
  11. Anneinside

    Anneinside Well-Known Member

    Be careful what you double-up on. Increasing your lithium can make you toxic, not a good thing. Increasing sleep aids can impair breathing or do other things.
  12. kote

    kote Account Closed

    just anti anxiety tablets.
    ones which had be prescribed to that limit once before.
    i dont recomend doubling up in any situation i recomend seeing your dr. first.
    i saw my wizard of a dr. and he solved all my problems and my wife's too.
    a genius of a man!!!
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