I feel like killing everyone I love.

Discussion in 'Rants, Musings and Ideas' started by HeroWho, Mar 22, 2011.

  1. HeroWho

    HeroWho Well-Known Member

    There's a few reasons, actually. If they're dead...

    1) I don't have to care about them anymore because they'll be happy.
    2) I don't have to worry about them because they'll be safe.
    3) They can't hurt me anymore.
    4) I won't hurt them anymore.
    5) I have seized any bad things that may have happened to them.

    I doubt I actually would, but I'm not overly fond of these thoughts. Is this the symptom of a curable mental disorder?
     
  2. ParodoxialShadow

    ParodoxialShadow Active Member

    ~I would like to say that no mental disorder is really 'curable', but most can be controlled. As for your rationalization for your inclinations, it seems you have thought about this a lot. I can relate, as I have had plenty of similar occurrences.
    ~I haven't figured out all the answers here, but if you want to talk about it, and try to figure things out with me, I'd be more than willing. I'll send you a friend request. (You don't have to accept)
    ~I am certain there is some depression in there, and that is pretty much something everyone here has. But also, I notice that you don't want to have to care about them anymore: does that mean that you regret the fact that you care about people?
     
  3. HeroWho

    HeroWho Well-Known Member

    Oops, I meant treatable, not curable.

    Also, it's a lack of wanting to care, really. Which, in effect, makes me regret caring for them in the first place.
     
  4. betteroffunknown

    betteroffunknown Well-Known Member

    Killing anyone is simply one manifestation of how one is feeling. I can empathasize with you in that one time (many years ago) I came dangerously close to doing this myself. I would encourage you to remember we can love a person(s), but we dont have to love how theyre behaving. It can be helpful (I know it has been for me) to remember this. And unless you plan on living with them the rest of your life you have eventual freedom to both look forward to and plan on. If you want to chat more please feel free to pm. If not that's ok, but I do hope for the best for you.

    Take good care.
     
  5. HeroWho

    HeroWho Well-Known Member

    That time is a little ways away, though. And I don't really want to live that much longer, anyway. Other then "freedom" (they'll never trulybe out of my life) I don't have anything to look forward to. Not to be a downer or anything :p