Being ignored an aliented all your life severely damages you, especially when you've been rejected by your only friend. I'm invisible, see. My new classmates don't see me. None of them think I need a friend. I know the consequences if I repeat what happened at Virginia Tech. That's why I can only turn on myself. It's just like someone said in another forum regarding V-Tech: Kill yourself to end your misery instead of killing others. To the world, if you're like me, alienated and invisible, you're not worth a damn. Everyone hates you the either way, whether you kill 31 people or whether you kill yourself. Now, I don't have pills at my side or any other tool by me to make my exit as I'm writing this. But the feeling is there; the feeling to make my escape from this hell called Life. To the world, my death would be just another suicide statistic. You'd think more people would reach out to the alienated, but they don't. The people that do reach out (like this former friend of mine, may she rot in hell) end up abandoning you because they just don't want to understand you. They choose by their own will to be ignorant rather than be educated by what you've gone through and about what to do to help you out. They never take your suicidal feelings seriously, and when you do attempt, they leave you hanging by the noose. Why go on when there's no one that can change your life?