I feel really horrible. Now this lust/crush has resurfaced.

Discussion in 'Family, Friends and Relationships' started by Britt, Dec 8, 2011.

  1. Britt

    Britt Well-Known Member

    I feel like one of those trolls on yahoo that confesses this..I have and had a slight obsession with my uncle. I've known him pretty much all of my life. And to be honest I've never had a crush on someone before let alone had lust for them. I guess no one really comes to my standards not even my uncle. But something about his personality really puts me on. He is the ideal man. Funny, smart and very good looking. Albeit a little overweight. The reason why I have never found one guy I liked in school was because I was well a loser. I never talked to any guy and no guy has ever talked to me before. I was and am the quiet type that never made a friend in high school...let alone a boyfriend. I was teased horrendously because of a body issue of mine. I already know I have really bad mental problems like depression possibly severe and anxiety which is also severe. Well please tell me that this is somewhat normal and that some people other than me has this problem? Because I am feeling more and more like a freak of nature.
  2. ItsOkayEllijah

    ItsOkayEllijah Well-Known Member

    I think you see him as a role model someone who accepts you for who you are. I think its completely normal to have a crush on someone who you see as a mentor. It will probably pass but I have to say don't act on your ideas it will leave you even more scared.
  3. Just"That"Guy

    Just"That"Guy Active Member

    This seems like it could be what's going on. I think I've had something similar happen before to me. I'm also very quiet and definitely not good with girls, on top of having the inability to make friends, so I think I might understand where you're coming from. Although my family has been limited to my mom and brother for the most part.
  4. Avarice

    Avarice Well-Known Member

    I think you need to be careful and take these feelings you're having for him with a pinch of salt. I remember when I first started therapy I had a bit of a thing for my therapist - it felt like he understood me, accepted me, and we had a ton in common on top of that. Eight months down the line and I now realize that what I thought I was feeling/the attraction I had towards him was born out of loneliness and some form of desperation. I was bullied in school and never really had many friends or boyfriends like you, and because of that I think we tend to attach ourselves to people we think we like simply because it feels like they accept us for who we are; but that attraction is often misguided and wrong, and simply there because of a lack of attention and acceptance from the other people around us.

    I hope that made some semblance of sense to you. The very fact that this guy is your uncle should deter you enough - I really don't think you should act on this, and instead let it blow over in time.
  5. Socialman

    Socialman Well-Known Member

    My sister like exploring with me sexually. The first girl I ever thought I loved was my cousin. She doesn't feel the same way, and we have nothing in common. It's perfectly normal to obtain crushes on family members sometimes. It's part of a younger psyche that was never properly or fully explored I suppose. Just don't act on it, and you should be fine.