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i feel really pathetic

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Anonymous Dude

Well-Known Member
#1
a little long, sorry

I'm 16, and I hate going to school. I'm in a special program because I missed literally a year of school, I barely left my house for a year, and even now I skip. They don't know what to do with me. All I do is listen to music and shoot the shit on my computer. I have no friends, the girl I like, might be the first girl who is interested in me. But i'm too much of a pussy to do anything about it. No one really knows how I feel except my therapist, who I wish I could see everyday. I have acne and I feel ugly, I can't look people in the eyes when I talk to them (I don't talk to alot of people). I don't know why i'm not on medication.

I can't keep on living this way. I do nothing all day, people tell me i'm smart, and i know i could pass high school easily, but i'm holding myself back. I just want to take my love interest in my arms and lay down with her and hold her close. I don't care about sex when it comes to her. My dream is just to go over to her house on her bed and we watch TV while she sits near me and we cuddle just talking about everything, I need human contact, I am very, very, lonely. I think I want to start smoking weed, but i don't know how to get it because i'm a fucking nerd who doesn't talk to anyone.

I never tell people how i'm feeling because it feels so trivial, i'm having problems while i have a house over my head, and free education, while people in the world are starving and dying and having real problems. I hate having self pity and feel pathetic when I admit my problems. I feel like shit being so emotionally fucked up, because I don't want to be that person.

I feel alot better getting it off my chest here. Thank you for reading
 

Ignored

Staff Alumni
#2
Hey Dude,
:welcome: to SF! I moved your thread here as you'll probably get more hits and welcomes here than where you had it. I have to say that as I read your intro I was struck by two things: how lovely you sounded and how much pain you were in. I would really advise against the weed at your age cos it can increase paranoia etc and probably isn't the best idea. It might be a good idea to go back to your doctor and let them know how much you are struggling and that you are willing to go onto medication.
Anyway, welcome again... there's loads of people here about your age and I'm sure you'll soon make plenty of friends.
 
#4
Hi and :welcome: to SF. I am glad you shared with us. I am sure you will find many who can relate to you and share their experiences as well. It is amazing the difference support can make when we are feeling so bad about things in our lives. Take care. :hug:
 

GhostOfYou

Well-Known Member
#5
Hey, welcome to SF ;)
I hope you find what you're looking for here. If you ever need anyone to talk to, I'm always here for you. Feel free to PM me anytime, alright?
Take care of yourself..

-GhostOfYou
 
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