I feel silly but..

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by sam21southwalesuk, Nov 8, 2010.

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  1. i feel so bad right now :( i didnt know where else to come, im usualy a happy guy. Im a popular guy in my area, i have a lot of friends etc. everyone thinks im strong and confident but im really not, im a mess inside :( im so insecure, i have a horrible family life :( ive not seen my dad in 3 years, when we used to be so close, a few of my bros and sisters are on drugs, its not nice :( i get home from work, and i just sit their, on here or watching tv.. all night, up all hours, hardly get any sleep. never talk to my mom either. ive stopped going out too. i know its silly but latley i feel i have fuck all to live for ? i got a shit dead end job in a call centre, im in like 2500 pound debt, cant afford to pay some of my bills, i have no love life, i sleep around, but it means fuck all :( im 21 and 22 next year, and i feel ive gone nowhere in life. im a young boy and should of done so much better by now. but i feel like im just a failure. at everything :( this might sound silly to you all, but to me, its not, im a mess, thats not everything, i really cant think straight right now :/ so im sorry if ive made no sense either. and to top it all off, latley ive been thinking i just want to end it :/ call it a day :( and im never ever usualy like this so its worried the hell out of me tonight.. ive actualy pictured myself killing myself? either that or killing someone! i feel so alone? and out of it right now. i just dont know what to do..where to go ughh :(
    and no, i dont want meds, i never ever take tablets etc. & no ive never touched a drug in my life. im normaly a normal guy :/
  2. Sadeyes

    Sadeyes Staff Alumni

    Hi Sam and so glad you are posting here...so many of us can relate to what you are saying...please continue to let us know how you are doing and how we can support you...J
  3. may71

    may71 Well-Known Member

    So it sounds like you have a bunch of different problems, but you might be able to fix things.

    If feeling suicidal has come on suddenly, it could be something related to seasonal change and possibly your vitamin D levels. It's easy enough to get vitamin D levels checked.

    Even if you won't take meds, checking in with a doctor might be a good idea.

    Therapy sounds like a good idea. Don't know if that is covered under UK health care.

    Insomnia - try meditation?

    If you want a love life, maybe someone that you have slept with wants that too? Anyone in particular that you liked?

    Can you try talking to your dad again?

    Any of your friends seem like people who you could be close to?
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