Hello, This summer has been a little rough for me. I've always had plenty of friends back in elementary and middle school, and even the start of high school and I used to get along with my family very well. However, these past couple of years, and especially this summer, has left me feeling very isolated and alone. I used to be quite popular in school (I don't care about popularity though, I would much rather have one really good friend than a load of so-so friends). I was very energetic, outgoing, and people really enjoyed my sense of humor. I used to LOVE school so much and had a lot of fun. I had very good grades and a nice group of people I hung out with, and an amazing best friend. However, during this summer a lot has changed. The group of people I used to hang out with and talk to constantly has stopped communicating with me. I try to message them but I either get no response or a very blunt one that obviously says "stop talking to me." My best friend is also starting to ignore me as well. Not intentionally though, I don't think. She is making a lot of new friends and I'm happy for her, because she is usually a very shy person; however, because she is making new friends she hasn't talked to me as much and I don't feel as comfortable talking to her as I used too. I also realized that I may be bisexual. I've always liked girls; however, recently, I started to like guys as well. Well actually, I thought that I may have liked guys back in middle school, but I put that off as a phase and a problem I can deal with later. Well its now later and my sexuality has caught up to me.... My family is extremely Christian. I don't live in a bible belt state but I might as well because that's where my family belongs. I have heard them make numerous homophobic comments and it really bugs me. I, myself, am much more liberal than them, and often times they love to share their views with me and it really bothers me that I can't say that I disagree with them because I know they will either kick me out or send me to some Catholic boarding school. I am about to enter my senior year of high school. I am currently working on my portfolio and application to attend a fashion school on the east coast. My family doesn't want me to move so far away from home or pursue fashion, but I really need to get out of here and fashion is my passion. I also have a dad who is very strict and low-key abusive. Often times he will get into fights with my mom and attack her, strangle her, hit her. She won't do anything about it. I have three older siblings but they are all away living their own lives so it's just me and my parents. Really though, it's just me. So right now I feel like I am just fighting life all by myself. I don't have anyone to talk to and lately I have been harming myself and thinking about killing myself (which I guess is why I am on this forum). I want to live because I know I will have a bright future but I have to make it there. Life is so hard right now and I find myself crying at random times throughout the day because the future seems so hopeless. I find myself <mod edit - methods> just contemplating which way would be the easiest. I kinda just want to talk to someone so I don't feel like I'm going through this by myself, so any thoughts would be greatly appreciated. TL;DR: I lost my group of friends. I am slowly losing my best friend to other people. I think I'm bisexual. I have an extremely religious family. I am about to enter senior year and my parents don't agree with the choices I am making for my future. I hate my dad. I feel alone. I am contemplating suicide but I know if I get through these next few years I have a bright future. I just need to talk to someone so I don't feel so alone. Thank you. (Sorry for the long post but I just had a lot to get out).