I feel so alone

[Evan1]

This pandemic has been really hard on me. I've spent my whole life growing up trapped in my room, lonely, with no friends. The friends I had were really only at school and I was never personally close to them. My mom was emotionally manipulative and abusive so I hid in my room away from her a lot. The entire time the main thing that kept me going was the excitement for college, where I would dorm and be by myself. Where I can be free and make friends and have a life and enjoy it. And I did. For the first time in my life, I felt free. I made such wonderful close friends who mean the world to me. In just one and a half semesters of college, I accomplished so much more than I ever have in my entire life. I was excited for every single day where I got to spend morning to night with people who love and care about me as I do with them too. We had so much fun in person and fooling around on campus and doing work together. But then, the pandemic happened. We all were quarantined and since then its been so hard. I feel so alone again. I thought I was finally free but I guess the universe thought that was too much for me and threw me back into loneliness. Of course I still message and call my friends every day but it's not the same as when we were all together. I got my first boyfriend in the middle of the pandemic too. He's my very best friend who I met in the first month of college and pre-covid we spent every day together, morning to night and he even dormed a few rooms down. We didn't get together until quarantine and I love him more than anything but its so hard when my primary love language is physical touch. Our relationship might as well be long distance, since neither of us can drive and I only get to see him like once a month or less. Every day its so painful. I wish we were back in person. I wish the pandemic will be over but by the time it is, I would already have lost more than half of my college experience. I miss my friends. Some of them I haven't seen since last year in march. I feel like I'm grieving the life I got to live for only half a year. It changed me and I would do anything to get it back but its not in my control. And I don't know how to cope with this.

 

[Sunspots]

I'm so sorry. That must feel really unfair. The isolation caused by the pandemic has been unbearable for so many people but I really feel for all the young people - not only have their studies been so badly disrupted but their whole lives too. This is the time when you should be going out in the world, learning how to start living independently and having fun.

Hopefully with the vaccination roll out things will soon get back to normal and you can return to college and all your friends

 

[Rockclimbinggirl]

Does your college have online spaces where students can connect?

I know my university does, and some clubs have Facebook and Discord groups.

 

[Walker]

Hey. I'm sorry that school life isn't turning out to be as great as it should be for you. I think after a year of this it's really taken it's toll on everyone. At the beginning I was like 'I was made for this life!!' and it bothered me literally zero and now I'm slugging through quicksand every day just to do anything at all. We're all feeling it right about now. Are you doing cool things with your bf? Online dates, playing games and watching movies and stuff? I do know that's not the same as seeing each other in person but keeping things more interesting than a few texts here and there is always good.

 

[Daphna]

This pandemic has been really hard on me. I've spent my whole life growing up trapped in my room, lonely, with no friends. The friends I had were really only at school and I was never personally close to them. My mom was emotionally manipulative and abusive so I hid in my room away from her a lot. The entire time the main thing that kept me going was the excitement for college, where I would dorm and be by myself. Where I can be free and make friends and have a life and enjoy it. And I did. For the first time in my life, I felt free. I made such wonderful close friends who mean the world to me. In just one and a half semesters of college, I accomplished so much more than I ever have in my entire life. I was excited for every single day where I got to spend morning to night with people who love and care about me as I do with them too. We had so much fun in person and fooling around on campus and doing work together. But then, the pandemic happened. We all were quarantined and since then its been so hard. I feel so alone again. I thought I was finally free but I guess the universe thought that was too much for me and threw me back into loneliness. Of course I still message and call my friends every day but it's not the same as when we were all together. I got my first boyfriend in the middle of the pandemic too. He's my very best friend who I met in the first month of college and pre-covid we spent every day together, morning to night and he even dormed a few rooms down. We didn't get together until quarantine and I love him more than anything but its so hard when my primary love language is physical touch. Our relationship might as well be long distance, since neither of us can drive and I only get to see him like once a month or less. Every day its so painful. I wish we were back in person. I wish the pandemic will be over but by the time it is, I would already have lost more than half of my college experience. I miss my friends. Some of them I haven't seen since last year in march. I feel like I'm grieving the life I got to live for only half a year. It changed me and I would do anything to get it back but its not in my control. And I don't know how to cope with this.

Here’s something I hope will comfort you, the common cold and the flu were introduced to the world as pandemics. Both of which continue to plague this world to this day, but the fear of them eased and life went back to normal after their discovery. I expect the same for the COVID.