I feel so awkward posting here....

Discussion in 'Welcome' started by TheRunaway, Oct 27, 2012.

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  1. TheRunaway

    TheRunaway Active Member

    I've never been good with introductions, and it doesn't seem as if I've gotten any better but I'll do my best. Hi, everyone. I'm B. I'm 18 and I've been mercilessly searching for a place similar to this. The members seem kind, caring, and not the least bit judgmental. I've been suffering from depression, and a mean eating disorder that comes and goes as it pleases. I thought I could continue with this burden-of-a-life if my older sister (I have two, but the other rarely comes around) was here with me. She's always there for me, but I've been feeling like a burden to her. After all, she deserves her own life without having to worry about me. But the reason my suicidal thoughts have amplified so much is because she's moving to live in the dorms where she has been going to school. Slowly, but surely, I feel my eating disorder creeping back up on me. I'm completely hopeless. My parents wanted to take me to a psychiatrist after they found out I was suicidal. It broke my mom's heart when she found out. She was angry, sad, and confused. I couldn't bring myself to ruining their life, so I've been shutting everyone out and putting on a show so no one knows what's wrong. I hope to just....just...have someone hear me out here. And ultimately make friends with those whom I can relate to. I write as a hobby. I also absolutely love nature, and everything in it. It brings me solace. Anyways, hi everyone. This site looks lovely.
  2. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

    Hi hun you are so right this place is a safe haven a place where noone judges others I hope you continue to post to reach out You will be heard here and understood hun hugs to you
  3. forest

    forest Banned Member

    Hi B, I wish you all the best in your recovery
  4. Wispiwill

    Wispiwill Well-Known Member

    It can seem strange, talking to people online about things you can't talk to the people in your life about, but I think it's also safer. You know how much you worry your family so you keep it bottled up but here - it's safe. You can talk about things and, maybe, find people that understand. I hope you find it helpful.

    Can I ask - you say that you write as a hobby. What do you write?
  5. youRprecious!

    youRprecious! Antiquities Friend

    Hi B - a warm welcome to SF :) It's a great place to gain support from like minds and to realise that we all need each other to help get us through this life so's we can enjoy it! No one was meant to function as an island - but sometimes there can seem to be so much ocean all around us and we don't know how to swim ....... but coming here and writing and talking about life and our feelings is so healing and freeing and helps with our confidence and perspective.:)
  6. TheRunaway

    TheRunaway Active Member

    First of all I just wanted to thank you all for the warm welcomes. I plan on becoming a very frequent member, so don't worry about. that. You all seem very understanding.
    I love to write short stories and poetry. :)
  7. Wispiwill

    Wispiwill Well-Known Member

    I think that writing can be a good way of dealing with your feelings. Do you find that? What kind of stories and poems do you write?
  8. destroythesethoughts

    destroythesethoughts Active Member

    Share your writing and thoughts with us. Yeah, we're all strangers but most of the time strangers will understand better than people who know you.
    I wish you good luck and never hesitate to reach me for someone to talk to :)
  9. TheRunaway

    TheRunaway Active Member

    Yeah, it's definitely one of my biggest saviors ever since my depression. That and nature. Hmmm I write about various topics (I'll definitely post some on the forum). I won an award in my old English class for one I've done on child abuse. I have some on demons, self-harming, and a lot of fantasy-like ones. I've only done a few short stories. The only ones I have that I'm proud of is one on Alzheimer's and another one. But, yeah, it definitely is a nice way to express emotion, and let off steam through words. Do you write?

    I will for sure. And thank you, if you ever need anything feel free to message me as well.
  10. Wispiwill

    Wispiwill Well-Known Member

    I have been known to attempt it on occasion. I'm more likely to start a story than finish it - and these days less likely to even do that. I look forward to reading whatever you choose to post on here.
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