I'm so scared. I'm scared of how dead I feel inside. I want to feel something, be it it happiness or anger or love or hurt or fun or laughter or pain or anything, I just want to feel. I've been hoping for so long that one day I will turn back on and I will feel alive again, but I don't and I am so scared that I will never feel alive again. Will I ever feel real? I would be OK if I felt pain, but I just feel nothing. I think of my future, be it a great future with a career and loving family or me ending my life in the next few weeks, and either way I feel nothing, and I am absolutely terrified. Somebody, please, help me feel alive. If this is what being alive feels like, I don't see how being dead could feel any different.