I feel totally worthless and weary

Discussion in 'Help Me! I Need to Talk to Someone.' started by sadhart, Feb 25, 2013.

Thread Status:
Not open for further replies.
  1. sadhart

    sadhart Well-Known Member

    I really hate my life and I feel there is no point in trying most days. Everyone wants me to listen to them.... especially when they want to label my character. Yet when I voice myself, it feels like in vain....even here sometimes Don't get me wrong, I appreciate there is a place like this, and I understand that other people are hurting to, but sometimes, it just feels like my words get lost in the shuffle if that makes sense. I really am trying to better my life, but I am limited to so many options at this time. I honestly don't know if there is a better way out other than finding the strength to take my life. I just want the pain to stop. Sorry if this sounded vague...I am too tired right now to go into every little detail into what's wrong.
     
  2. Sadeyes

    Sadeyes Staff Alumni

    Hi Sadhart...if you feel discounted here, what can you do to be heard? I have always said that pain is not a contest and each person's should be respected...if I can be of any help for you to navigate our forum more effectively, I would gladly try...please PM me if I can help
     
  3. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

    Hugs to you hun you are being heard hun ok please know that we care h ugs
     
  4. flowers

    flowers Senior Member

    hi. I have known what it feels like to not be heard. Are you saying that you just need to be heard and have your voice witnessed without all the suggestions? If so, I totally get that. Sometimes we all need that. If thats it, then I am here to hear ya. To witness your voice and words. And I know that others will too if thats what you need. Its a valid request if this is what it is. :hug:
     
    Last edited by a moderator: Feb 26, 2013
  5. sadhart

    sadhart Well-Known Member

    I don't mind suggestions, so long as what I have said isn't misunderstood or twisted. I mean more like when people want me to listen to them, but when I respond to them, it seems I don't or really, should not expect the same type of courtesy. I don't want to just vent....I want to feel like I matter in this world. Maybe that doesn't make sense....I just want to give up right now. Sorry.
     
  6. flowers

    flowers Senior Member

    I am sorry that happens to you. I personally can get triggered when people twist my words. I am all too used to not being undeerstood. Its sort of my life. It feels very isolating. Is that the kind of feeling you have?
     
  7. sadhart

    sadhart Well-Known Member

    Yeah, often times that's how I feel. Last year, three people, one being my mother, the other being my cousin and his wife, decided to give me a "tough love" talk. The thing in all my 30 years, my cousin and his wife have rarely ever spoken to me. And my mother was so fake in the conversation....she tells them what I do wrong, and leaves out that sometimes she is the one in the wrong. They walked away form the conversation thinking they made such a positive impact in my life, when really I felt kind of lost and even more disillusioned.

    Anyway, a couple of months ago, I wrote a strongly worded letter to my cousin and his wife. It was very long and exhausting to write. But I let them know that maybe in the future when they want to run down my character, have the decency to know who I am...I also said a lot of "damn you's" to my cousin. They came to visit last month, and tried to be friendly, but I sort of snubbed them, because I know they got the letter, and I said in it that I had no problem having a real conversation unlike the other one that was nothing more than a one sided, self righteous load of crap. They tried to be friendly, but I ignored them for the most part. Don't get me wrong, i am not a good person and I do wrong things at times, but this family is so full of themselves and the whole "do as i say not as i do" crap got old a long time ago.

    Anyway, I'm sorry for writing so much....and I probably left some things out. Sorry again.
     
  8. flowers

    flowers Senior Member

    now I see more about what you mean. sighs, sometimes in disfunctional families theres the "IP" thats the person everyone can focus on as being the problem. While doing that allows them to not see what they themselves are doing and carrying as disfunctions . They choose one person to focus on as the "IP" and then get to not focus within on their own stuff. And because its a collective family thing, they all can have the support of each other in doing it. It is disfunctional and destrctive to the person they focus on as the "IP". But it also allows the others to not address their own issues. What you wrote about reminded me of that.
     
Thread Status:
Not open for further replies.