I finally found the promised land, and I was denied entry...

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by JimmySand9, Apr 20, 2012.

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  1. JimmySand9

    JimmySand9 Member

    A few months ago, I fell in love with a girl. I had looked for more than a decade for someone that I felt a connection with, and I finally found it in her. However, despite my deep feelings for her, in the end she did not want to be any more than friends. I had a hard time coping, but about a month later it seemed like she was starting to come around. However, this turned out to be another mirage, and the end result was far too painful to cope with. She actually started talking to a good friend of mine, who also happens to my next-door neighbor. And soon, they started getting more serious. Seeing them together is like a million daggers stabbing me in every possible nerve. And while I haven't seen them together very often lately, I know they're still together, and I know she won't be seeing me the way I need her too.

    So, to get to brass tacks, I'm really starting to think that nothing else is worth it. I found everything I ever wanted in her, and she doesn't want to even give me a chance. And I have to watch her give someone else a chance right in my face. And I know I'm never going to find anyone like her again; or even someone different, but just as good. They might be out there, but I'll never get to meet them. I don't want to live in a world with no hope of ever finding my promised land. I already found it, I can't have it; everything my life was leading up to was taken away.
     
  2. spidy

    spidy Well-Known Member

    In my time i have met plenty of girls ones id love to be with had best mates get to them before yes its crushing but seriously its not the end of the world.You just have to think smart and say to yourself well she obviously isnt the one.Maybe the one is still yet to come along in your life.
     
  3. pppqp

    pppqp Well-Known Member

    hi jimmy. i'm sorry to be a bit blunt but i think you are still young. am i right?
    in a lifetime, it's inevitable that you gotta be heart broken at least once. everybody got through it. it's difficult, very difficult at first... but time will heal.
    easily said than done, i know. but soon enough, you'll realize that this pain definitely makes you stronger :)

    take care xx
     
  4. slam

    slam Member

    <Mod Edit - Acy - Insensitive>
     
    Last edited by a moderator: Apr 20, 2012
  5. JimmySand9

    JimmySand9 Member

    This sounds like the same pablum I've heard before. You're young, you've got your whole life ahead of you. Well, life has become increasingly more painful. And the idea of having 30-70 more years of this agony is too much to take. I had one real dream, and it was taken away.
     
  6. spidy

    spidy Well-Known Member

    As i said mate is part of life ive lost many loves of my life recent was one i was married to for ten years seriously dont get to hung up i kid you not the next one could be right around the corner.you will prob find so relationships might not work and we as a people sometimes dont have any control over somethings.Just be calm and patient you never know she might not work out with your nieghbour then you might get a chance.
     
  7. StevenSiew

    StevenSiew Well-Known Member

    You said "I found the promised land and I was denied entry".

    I hate that term "promised land", it implies that you were promised a girl that will love you back. There is no such promised in life. This sounds harsh but I think you should not be fooled by TV show or Hollywood movies. The purpose of those things are to make money and they can only make money if they make the audience happy. What does the audience wants? Happy endings, wonderful romantic love. Girls and women that loves their man and are wonderfully nice. The world is not like that. People are flawed.

    Love is not you find a person whom you love and find everything you want in her. Love is you find a person who cares about you and willing to share their life with you. You did not find love. You said you fell in love with her. But that's easy. It's easy to find a person whom you want and like. That's one of the easiest things in the world.

    But it is what you did not find that matters.

    It's not the end of the world and this is an important lesson to you. What you should be looking for is NOT a person that you want and like.

    What you should be looking for is a person what cares about you and wants to share part of their life with you. Then you can make a decision whether you want to love her back and start a relationship with her.
     
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