i finally get it

i was looking through my pills to try and see if I could try and kill myself with them but unfortunately I don't have enough so I think I'm going to try <mod edit - methods> so I don't have to suffer anymore.

 

Hi ponkotsu, I am sorry that you feel like that, I really hope that you do not! I can't imagine what that would be like. Please do not do that to yourself or someone else. I know that life can be hard, I wish that you would talk in here and tell us what is wrong or troubling you! Life is to special and precious to just try to end it like that, We cannot judge you but that certainly is no way to leave this world, I don't know if you have family or friends but there must be someone that you care about, or that cares about you!. Please stay or come back here and talk to us share what is bothering you or has hurt or harmed you so much that you fee that you cannot go on! Your life is valuable it is precious, you are a unique person that has a place here. Please give us a chance and yourself as well, Talk to someone here, we can possibly help and support you to help you find your life or a reason for going on. I believe you are depressed and when you are your brain has chemicals that distort your feelings and thoughts! Please let us try to work and talk with you!, will one more day here make that much difference, stay or come back here and let us see what we can do for you!
We are here for You!

 

I can't handle that I'm the sort of person people have to heal and recover from. I tried killing myself last night but it didn't work so I'm going to try again.