I found someone who is a lot like me

Discussion in 'Rants, Musings and Ideas' started by Athnys, May 27, 2012.

  1. Athnys

    Athnys Well-Known Member

    Some people say that everyone has a twin somewhere in the world, and I think I found mine.

    This person graduated from the same college as me at the same time. He's about my age. We both have many of the same interests, and we are both quiet, gentle, and reticent people. We're both good-natured, intelligent, and friendly, though we are both introverted and shy. We have simple and inexpensive tastes.

    This is where the similarities end, though.

    He has eight brothers and sisters in a close-knit family, and I am an only child. He was home-schooled and taught how to survive without Wal-Mart. He's tutored children in various subjects, taught swimming and sports, educated people in gun safety, started his own business, raised animals, and won all sorts of academic and civic awards for his endeavors. He repairs old computers, and he can take apart heavy machinery and put it back together. He has many friends and is sought after by women but remains single. He and two of his sisters tied for salutatorian at our graduation, and his sisters likewise have many accomplishments.

    I went to public school. I was bullied for many years, frequently beaten up, sexually abused in high school, and hated by teachers. I was put on behavior medications and put in two mental health clinics for children. I had teachers tell me that I'd never make anything of myself in life and that I shouldn't go to college. I always had difficulty finding work as an adult, and my college degrees never got me anything but debt. I was turned away from the Catholic priesthood because of my poor mental health and lack of work experience.

    He contacted me after graduation and got me to create my own LinkedIn profile. I looked at his profile and was blown away by all the things he had accomplished, while I myself have accomplished very little.

    I often told my parents that I wanted to start a business, but they never supported me because they said it was too risky. I wanted to raise farm animals on our 40-acre property, but they forbade it because it was too much money with little return. I wanted to keep bees, but my parents didn't think that it was a good investment. I wanted to cut and split wood to sell, but that's been on hold forever. I wanted to try growing and canning vegetables for home, but that was turned down because it was just easier to buy from the supermarket. I never had any of the opportunities or chances that my counterpart had.

    I've been depressed for many years, and I have no motivation to do anything and no confidence that anything I do will succeed. I've wanted to die for a very long time, but I won't kill myself. I don't date because I feel like there are better men out there, and because I feel like I would be a bad boyfriend, husband, and father. I struggled through these last couple semesters not because I didn't understand anything, but because I was too depressed and distraught to really focus on my schoolwork.

    I feel like closing my LinkedIn profile. I am nothing next to him. He has many jewels in his crown, and I don't even have a crown.

    I wonder if the shoe were on the other food, he would be just like me and I like him.
    Last edited by a moderator: May 27, 2012
  2. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

    YOur environment your living in it not permitting you to survive hun. You need to get away from that environment and start living life as you want to live it. You have all this ambition all these endeavors yet cannot accomplish them because of family. Make something of the education you are obtaining and move out ok and start fulfilling these plans you have hugs
  3. Gimiq

    Gimiq Well-Known Member

    That and realize what your friend who did so well already knows that your worth many crowns that is why he keeps your company. Does a wise man sell his prize sheep? No he keeps it, finds another and multiply his investment. So.... Smile, maybe tell your friend your looking for new opurtunities and see what he says. That may have sounded a little preachy, sorry I was raised in church my whole life so it jumps out sometimes. So if it didnt give you hope hopefully my goofyness will make you laugh.