I GAINED 10 pounds!

Discussion in 'Mental Health Disorders' started by Passion, Mar 22, 2008.

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  1. Passion

    Passion Well-Known Member

    I'm freaking out, im having a panic attack, I don't know how this happened, oh my god. oh my god. oh my god.
    I was doing so good..I was so skinny but still at a healthy weight...
    120 pounds at 5'5...
    and then I stepped on the scale
    and it said
    What did I do wrong?
    I cant do this..
    I knew I should have been watching myself.. oh my god..
    I hadnt weighed myself in a couple months, cause i was worried about my weight and knew i was obsessing too much...
    but i should have stepped on the scale and watched myself..
    and now im crying..
    I dont want to touch food ever again.
    I cant do this.
    I cant.
    oh god.
    how did I gain 10 pounds?!?
    I dont think I look like I gained THAT much...
    oh god...
    help me..someone help me...
    I feel like killing myself right now.
    I feel fat and ugly and i cant do this..
    oh god.
  2. theleastofthese

    theleastofthese SF Friend Staff Alumni

    I don't think that's a bad weight for someone your height. That's just my opinion but I don't think that's bad at all. Cut yourself some slack. You're not fat, at least not to me.:hug:
  3. The_Discarded

    The_Discarded Staff Alumni

    Been exercising much? Might've been muscle you gained. :hug:
  4. Melmoth the Wanderer

    Melmoth the Wanderer Well-Known Member

    I'm glad you were able to resist weighing yourself for two months. When I was anorexic, the scale determined my behavior. I weighed myself at least twice a day. If the number was higher than the last weighing, I did a set of exercises I'd made up and would eat very little until the next weighing. I made the scale the center of my life.

    There are many possible reasons for the weight gain. As women, our weights tend to fluctuate with our menstrual cycles (mostly because of water retention), so this could simply be temporary. If you've been under a lot of stress lately, that can also make the body retain water. Another thing to consider is that your scale may not be calibrated correctly. The changing seasons often means variations in humidity and temperature, both of which can cause a weighing scale to dysfunction (that's why most doctors use balance scales instead).

    Most importantly, don't worry about the number. You're still well within a healthy weight range for your height--in fact, 130 is really a healthier weight for you than 120. Try to go by how you're physically feeling than by what the scale says.
  5. Passion

    Passion Well-Known Member

    I felt much better when i was 120.
    I at one point in time was around 105 or so but i know that was really bad.
    120 felt like the correct weight.
    now i feel very uncomfortable with myself. ive even been thinking about suicide, which scares the hell out of me.
    and all because of a stupid number on a scale. I hate how much power it has over me.
  6. nagisa

    nagisa Staff Alumni

    I'm so sorry that this is such a problem for you. I completely understand. :hug: If you ever want to talk, feel free to PM me, sweetie.
  7. thegrey

    thegrey Member

    Haha I feel this way too. :/ Because I keep binge-eating. Which is a condition called emotional eating. I'm trying to curb it now. Try to exercise too! It'll make you feel better. You can't really blame it that it has such power over you since the society we lived in now kind of... "structure" all these thinking in us xD
  8. savetoniqht

    savetoniqht Well-Known Member

    Weight doesn't always mean too much. If you didn't even notice you gained ten pounds chances are your weight was fluctuating, which happens a LOT. Weight really does fluctuate all the time, and it could have just been when you weighed yourself. Regardless, if you didn't even notice it then I highly doubt anyone else did, you know? Trust me, I understand the anxiety that comes with gaining weight, but it's obvious that you were making progress since you were able to stop obsessing about your weight, and I doubt you want to give that up now, you know?
  9. ggg456

    ggg456 Guest

    :hug: It does sound frightening. I've felt similar to you and would if I was a weight that scared me a lot.

    What do you think would happen now?

    Do you feel that killing yourself is a real possibility? I do hear how frantic and desperate you are. I've felt so similar in the past. Do you have any support, in terms of therapy to help you emotionally?

    I'd try and keep myself safe as possible as personally, I know I'd be likely to go into a horrible cycle of restriction or b/p ing or exercising. Safety would mean calming myself down, saying it's ok, 130 is ok, it doesn't reflect on me as a human being which is more complicated than a number on a scale, and exploring my feelings of desperation with a therapist.

    I hope you take care of yourself.
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