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i give up

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aaaarghhhh really why is everything so hard? so trying to sort out leaving uni/finding somewhere to live/finding a job etc because you know apparently that will be the magic solution but really what is the point? how is everything going to be better..and i mean at all? uni isnt the problem. I'm the problem. how is leaving uni going to make me a less fucked up individual. it isnt. i dont really have a choice, sure uni isnt making anything better. ill be kicked out probably if i dont leave or fail. but really, why am i bothering with all this crap? it wont make a difference. if im leaving in 3 weeks and the date is in 3 weeks why am i bothering why not just not bother? its not going to work out anyway. and if it did, how does that stop me losing it more. really just what is the point in any of this when i have no idea even who the hell i am anymore. i cant even explain what i mean. this is just so impossible. i utterly give up.
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