I got a job, sort of.

Discussion in 'Rants, Musings and Ideas' started by jdu, Nov 5, 2012.

  1. jdu

    jdu New Member

    I was laid off 2 years ago from a job I could no longer stand anyway. That was a good thing back then, the layoff. But recently they re-hired me on a different shift to replace someone who is on disability for 3 months. So it's a temporary, consulting thing. Even though I have to pay $20 a day just to park, the money is decent. It's the first paycheck I've had in two years. But it's incredibly depressing to be back there, especially on the midnight shift. On this shift there is little to do and my co-workers are disinterested and not good to be around. Like a living death. The workplace has all the same problems it did when I last worked there, and I can't change them. And I have all the same bad feelings about it and about myself, that I had 2 years ago. Every time my shift ends I feel powerless, stupid, ashamed, and want to get as far away as possible, then go home and sleep all day, because I'd rather be unconscious. I can just barely stand to be there. To make it worse, I can't get a similar job at a different workplace. I'm not in a good mental state to interview, to try to prove my worth to strangers. My rent is too high so I can't afford not to do this. This situation seems like the only option and it's a dreary and depressing one.
     
    Last edited by a moderator: Nov 5, 2012
  2. pickwithaustin

    pickwithaustin Staff Alumni

    Though I don't know the job specifics and it is possibly my thoughts won't apply... What you can do is to work hard and excel in this time that you are there, even if it is temporary. If you shine, perhaps it will get noticed. Perhaps the next full position open, you may get asked to fill. Or, what if the person away on disability cannot come back at all in the end for some reason?

    When one of my sons complains about work, I always remind him that it is called work for a reason. If it were fun, it would be called play. Make the best of the worst and focus on your own self satisfaction. Excel because it makes you feel good inside to know you are working hard and doing things correctly and with good intention.
     
  3. WildCherry

    WildCherry Staff Member ADMIN

    I know how hard it is to work at a job where you're completely miserable but forced into it by the need for a paycheck. Most people don't like to go to work, but there's a difference between that, and being at a job where the environment around you just brings you down and makes you feel terrible about yourself... and that sounds like the situation you're in.

    Is there any way that, while you're doing this job, you can try to work on your mental state to better prepare you for possible interviews in the future? Are there other things making you feel bad besides the job?
     
  4. jdu

    jdu New Member

    I am 45 years opld. I can not do this anymore.
     
  5. Sadeyes

    Sadeyes Staff Alumni

    Are you allowed to use the internet during work times or can they pay for education? Maybe there is a way to use this as a mid point towards something else