if there is a god up there, he only takes pleasure in setting me up for extreme suffering. i swear there is something happening here. how can a benevolent god do this to me? was there something horrible i did in a previous life? i sit in a hole with darkness around me. god put me here. i simmer in my own absolute despair. i pray to god for some relief. i see a rope coming down straight from the hand of god himself. i cry with happiness and joy, knowing he's finally taken mercy on me, and is going to finally, after all these years, give me the rope i need to escape this pit of misery. what happens? the rope stops just out of reach. a whole new world of suffering enters my mind. how can i reach the rope and free myself? my sanity nearly leaves me as I claw my hands bloody at the rope. suddenly, as though god himself is mocking me, he slowly pulls the rope away. i am sent into absolute despair as i watch the rope from god slowly disappear. every once in a while god will dip the rope back down, but it never really comes close to me anymore. this is my story. make of it what you will.