I hate life!

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by BravoFREAK, Feb 27, 2008.

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  1. BravoFREAK

    BravoFREAK Active Member

    I truly do
    I dont care what you think about this i just want to get stuff off my chest

    Well Im 16, almost 17
    (I know most of you people say Im to young and life will get better, but that dont help the way i feel)
    I have been feeling worthless, invisible... alone since I was about 13
    I am a very athletic guy, I tend to spend my school times hanging around all the so called "popular" group. But once I leave school, its all different.
    Noone cares about me, noone ever wants to do anything with me

    I tend to hide these feelings I have quite well, most people think Im generally a happy fella
    I put on a fake smile when im in a crowd...
    I have had suicidal thoughts for quite a while now, but the only thing keeping me from attempting is the fear of failing.
    If I fail, people will find out about how I feel... which is my biggest fear!
    Which makes me even more scared of telling anyone... if i tell people, wouldn't that strip all my fears of attempting?

    well I guess if you could give me any advice, it would be appreciated
    Im just not a big fan of the "it will get better"
    thank you
     
  2. Carcinogen

    Carcinogen Well-Known Member

    This may be bad advice, but is there any way you could start hanging around with a less popular group of people? With the popular groups there always seems to be a lot of competition and one-up-manship, which gets in the way of true friendship. Maybe if you were out of the public eye, as it were, you'd be able to find people who care about you all the time, not just about being seen with you in school.

    I'd also suggest you try to find help (yes I may be a hypocrite) but if you were to go and see someone privately it might help you.
     
  3. dazzle11215

    dazzle11215 Staff Alumni

    i guess it depends who you tell. i didn't tell family or friends, but worked up some nerve and told my family doc i was thinking obsessively, like 24/7 about killing myself. he took it from there, and 6 weeks on i have more support than i ever thought possible.

    friends won't always know how to respond, some will help, some will say stupid things, like "what do you have to be depressed about" and "snap out of it...."....

    a pro can put you in touch with the many resources that are out there to help you get through this difficult time,

    c.
     
  4. touglytobeloved

    touglytobeloved Well-Known Member

    I will not say it will get better. You are the only one who can knew that. I can only say you can try.
    And, i want to tell you that i have the same fear as you, from failing, and i put a fake smile sometimes...
    But, hey, read my threads and i think that you will see, in some way, that you are much happier than you think, you just dont know that, yet... The only thing you have to do is to find a way to get to your happiness...
     
  5. almosteasy

    almosteasy Well-Known Member

    From what you wrote your problem seems to be social isolation. You said "no one wants to do anything with you when you leave school," it may be because you picked the wrong crowd to hang out with.

    Pick friends based on who you think you can trust, have a lot in common with and how much they enjoy your company, not by how popular they are. If you do this I guarantee you that you will have real friends who will help with those feelings of suicide.

    Go out and do things that you enjoy, this is an excellent way to make new friends. Get a GF, that one always helps :biggrin:

    At the moment you most likely suffer from mild depression with suicidal thoughts. This can get better with time, if your situation improves. Or it may go away on its own. I know it doesn’t feel like it at the moment but you have a really good chance of getting better. Hang in there!
     
  6. Viskar

    Viskar Member

    Sounds to me like you're being too limited. I'm willing to bet when you hang around the popular kids you actually sit there quiet, forcing yourself to be invisible, so you can guilt trip yourself.

    In high-school I was always with the 'cool kids', and the 'popular kids', and I would be so loud, and random that it cracked everyone up. Even the random people watching us. I wouldn't be juvenille, or a punk or anything. Just good clean fun - Enjoy it. If you make them happy, it'll make you happy. Have a good time, and you won't feel miserable. It's preety simple. Feel sad, you'll be sad. Feel happy, you'll be happy.

    When I feel sad, I dance. Just random miniature break-dancing (I love break dancing) so do something you enjoy doing when you're sad, and have a good time with it. S'easy mode. If you deny anything I just said, and don't try it - It proves you enjoy feeling this way. Step up, or step down. Now's your chance.
     
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