I didn't get to be alone, anyway. My mother is visiting her parents, and my father was planning to go there, as well, today, and they'd both come home, tomorrow evening, but he decided to go tomorrow morning, instead. He kept pointing out that I need to fix food, so while he was resting, I fried broccoli and falafels, and was thinking he would be happy to see that I'm eating something better than just pizza. When he woke up, and saw what I was eating, he basically started shouting at me that it isn't food, and that I'm not getting any protein, and that I need to learn to fix food if I'm going to be able to do by myself in my apartment. Then he said I've only fixed food once, while my mother's been away, when I had actually done it three times. The food I was eating, this time, didn't count, and the pizza I've fixed, before, didn't count, either. Only the macaroni with soy sausages and ketchup counted. I hate him. It's not easy to say I hate him, but I do. I wish he would drop dead. I swear I do; almost all he's done my whole life is criticise me. The nice things he's done do not outweigh the negative things. It doesn't matter that his mother was difficult with him; it does not justify him doing the same to me. Also, it's not just that; he's actually a bad person; we were watching a programme about illegal immigrants in Sweden, basically being used as slave labour, due to the salaries being so low, but he actually defended this practice, saying he well could consider, doing the same; if someone would offer working for him for a seriously low salary, he'd have no problem with it. It doesn't matter that his company is not going very well; it is not an excuse for slave labour. He stands for so many other bad things, as well... I've actually had to ask my mother if it isn't possible that she had an affair, before having me, since I'm so unlike my father, but she denies, and I guess it's highly unlikely it would've happened, considering her person. We're almost opposites to each other... we just cannot be friendly. He may think, at times, that I'm being friendly, but what I'm really doing is keeping him at bay, since any miniscule detail could lead to an argument. I do everything to avoid deeper conversation with him; he's just too fucking stupid! How is it possible that I became so overly intelligent that I am in constant pain, when he's such a stupid person? I have such a problem with saying that word... "father." My "father."