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I hate my life!

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by xXAnonamousXx, Jul 1, 2007.

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  1. xXAnonamousXx

    xXAnonamousXx New Member

    I hate my life, I hate my self. Im 16, i have neva told ANYONE how I feel. I just cant, i hate it so much. I have neva had a girlfriend, and things dont look to bright for the future. I am the biggest pussy and it kills me inside. I have liked girls that liked me back, but to scared to do/say anything. This recently happened and the girl I liked started cutting herself again because she was over it, and thought I didnt like her. I have quite a big temper even though I have never gotten angry in public. I build it all up and constantly hurt myself and the amount of damage i have done to our house from my anger is gettin to much. I constantly stay home on the computer acting as someone im not to try and make me feel betta, but things just gettin outa hand.
    I live alone with my mum, shes barly home though I prefer to be alone. Because I guess thats the only time i let out my anger/feelings and kinda makes me feel betta. The only reason im still around today is because im to scared to do anything. I guess this is a good thing but im already dead inside =[

    My friends dont even know me, my family dont know me and ive lost everything I once had.

    I know this is all everywhere, but I had to get it out.
  2. Random

    Random Well-Known Member

    Wow! Some things here sound really familiar!

    I know some of this is gonna sound really corny and cliche and I guess it is but it's true so....

    I'm 33 now. When I was your age, I was exactly like that. I was a very angry kid. I don't even know why, really. But you know, your thoughts and feelings....and even your life are not so out of the ordinary. It's not unusual for young people to be angry and confused and afraid and not know what to do or where their lives are going.

    I'm still dealing with some serious issues but you know what? I've grown tremendously. If I'd given up on life when I was your age (I really, really wanted to), I would have missed so many wonderful things. I've suffered a lot (psychologically) but I've enjoyed a lot too. I found ways of dealing with my anger. I'm almost never angry anymore. I found some peace. It isn't impossible. There's hope.

    It's never good when someone is feeling bad about themselves. But it's especially bad when someone is as young as you are and feeling this badly. Because believe it or not, you're going through a time when things are in a constant state of flux and that can throw a lot of things out of whack and make you feel and do all sorts of things.

    But most of all....what I always want to tell people your age is that you haven't really even had time to live yet. Give it time. You don't know that things can't get better for you. It might feel like things will never get better but they can. And that's especially true when you're still so young. You never know what the future holds.

    As far as the thing with girls goes - I have found (in my limited experience) that the more you stress about it, the harder it makes it. Have you tried seeing if friends can help you get together with a girl you like? Sometimes it helps if someone else can help you to get your foot in the door.

    When I got my first girlfriend, my sister was friends with her and I got my sister to find out if she liked me and tell her I liked her. I had some great times with her. I'll never forget her. I was 14 at the time. I spoke to her just recently. She still remembers me as well.

    So my life isn't so great. But it could be. If I hadn't given myself a chance to live and learn and grow, I'd have never known. And that would have been a shame. Because sometimes, just living is all you can do and the reward may not come for a long time. I learned things from my worst times that I couldn't have learned any other way. It wasn't fun but it was necessary.

    I especially tell young people they should hang in there. Because you really should.

    And try to find a way to deal with your anger. When I was your age, I found solace in music. Try and get yourself interested in mellow music. It can be very relaxing and calming when you're really upset to sit down, put on your headphones and just relax. Try and avoid artists with really angry, hateful lyrics. That will only upset you and agitate you. There are many artists who make music that is good for relaxation and meditation. If nothing else, it helps you to clear your mind a bit and helps you think. Or at least, that's what I've found.

    If you find that you enjoy doing something, look it up on the internet and learn more about it. When I was your age, I had to go to the library to learn anything I wanted to know. There was no internet as we know it today. Now, there's no limit to what you can learn. You can go anywhere. Explore. Explore yourself, especially. You don't have to learn only what people want you to learn. You can choose the things you're interested in and learn as much about them as you want to. You can find other forums just like this one based on the things you enjoy. It's important to reinforce the things that please you and make you happy and avoid things that make you feel bad and unhappy.

    In spite of all of it, you will feel bad sometimes. Everybody does. Some more than others. It's just life. You do get used to it. When it seems like you can't take any more. Take time out if you can and do something you enjoy. Whatever it is. Everybody enjoys something.

    Don't sweat the thing with girls too much. I haven't had a GF in over ten years and it doesn't really bother me too much. There have been times when I'd have very much liked to have one but they pass.

    But here's what's important. If you want to get to know a certain girl, just tallk to her. You don't have to walk up to her and ask her for a date. Just talk to her like you would anyone else. Remember that girls are just people. We put them on a pedestal sometimes and it can make them seem unapproachable. You have to find some way to bring her down out of the stratosphere so you can see that she's only human and has flaws and fears and insecurities of her own.

    I hope that at least some of this has been helpful (if you even read it). The advice of others always seems petty and cliche but if you try some of it, you might find it's pretty good advice.
    Last edited by a moderator: Jul 1, 2007
  3. xXAnonamousXx

    xXAnonamousXx New Member

    geeze thnx alot
    I was really thinkin twice bout comin here but
    u have really made me feel alot betta
    Yes I did read it all lol, and yea i think im gonna try some of it
    you dont know how much uve helped me
    something good has just happened in mty life, then I come here and read this
    just made my day even betta
    this is gonna be my first night in a very long time
    I am going to bed feeling happy

    feels good someone has taken there time to try and help me
    thnx alot man
  4. Random

    Random Well-Known Member

    You're quite welcome :smile:

    When you feel bad....don't hesitate to post here. I will try and respond if you do. If I don't, I'm sure someone else will. This place is meant to be a place you can come and feel comfortable talking about your feelings. It helps to talk. The more pressure you get off your chest by writing about it, the less you'll have building up inside you with nowhere to go. Just about everyone here has felt the way you do (or have been) at some time or another. Many people here understand and can relate.
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