I HATE SF. I LOVE this completely safe platform. Both are true. Read why here. ;-)

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by ToHelp, Jan 27, 2008.

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  1. ToHelp

    ToHelp Well-Known Member

    First, muchas gracias to Robin. We often take our luxuries for granted, as did I, brand-spanking new at first, picking apart how it was paid for.

    In one short month, I've come to understand a lot of things better.

    Anyway "I hate this damned place" as it affirms and confirms that life truly does suck, and the suckage truly is spread the world over. I have to constantly evaluate whether making this a regular destination is good for me or not. Is the forum as a whole a so-called, "trigger"? I doubt that but have had to carefully monitor my feelings and cogitate over the question (which is a good question for anyone, actually).

    I am very grateful to have this destination. (The is the "I love this place" part lol) It affirms and confirms that life for so many others is indeed difficult, and that I am hardly an anomaly or freak among humankind.

    Here's as good an example as any. I come here again and again because I find that what I feel, others feel too, and sometimes far worse.

    I've explained this before but the screen name "ToHelp" was just an off-the-cuff name I chose because I didn't want it be negative. I wanted my stay here to be life-affirming and not "well I'm just going to off myself because the night has been too lonely and the road has been too long" (to blatantly steal AHEM- borrow, from Bette Midler... lol).

    In a strange yet perhaps fateful twist, I have found that sometimes my sharing and my knowledge is helpful to others. I've received PMs saying thank you. You know what that does to your day? It makes it. Or if someone comes up to you and says your presence makes a difference, the effect (for me) is life-affirming.

    You may even start to see, "Wow, my existence here is not *all* about me; it feels good helping others." This, I deem a "spiritual realization" of sorts--perhaps even growth.

    On that note, I'm aware that I must validate people's feelings. If you're depressed, it's not your fault and if you "feel like shit every fucking day" and bitter towards the world and life itself--you have every right and I'm not here to judge that.

    * * *​

    Before I run I'd like to thank the entire forum (already 'thunked' Robin)--ALL members, all staff, all moderators, admins--for helping provide the ultimate Suicide Destination on the Internet! . . . [. . .pauses; crickets are heard]

    :what:​

    Kay, that didn't come out... just... right. lol :puke:

    Try again. Now, when someone keys in .com, .net, or .org, they'll find us (thanks Robin, we know you guys actually have to buy exclusivity rights to this stuff :thumbup:)--making us a premier Suicide Discussions Destination on the web.

    Much like Robin I would suppose, I cannot think of an "uplifting" name for the forum, or more importantly, something people in crisis could easily locate through Google.

    It is what it is and it fills a void.

    ToHelp

    :sf:
     
  2. gentlelady

    gentlelady Staff Alumni

    Re: I HATE SF. I LOVE this completely safe platform. Both are true. Read why here. ;-

    Many people have found this forum because of googling in the word suicide. They were searching for methods to end their lives, not save them. Because of the name of this forum it comes up. They look at the site and read some of the contents. Many sign up and become new members of our community. They find support here at a crucial time in their lives. For this reason, I think the forum is aptly named. With any other name, it wouldn't be found for those that need us. It was how I happened upon the forum.
    I can understand what you mean when you say you hate it yet you love it. The right balance must be found for those who frequent this site to ensure it does not do as much harm as good. We need to learn where our boundaries are and be careful not to overstep them. They are different for each person. When to walk away is not always an easy thing to know. The beauty is that we can give support to others when we are able and receive it when we are not. Thank you for your insight ToHelp. :hug:
     
  3. rojomi

    rojomi Banned Member

    Re: I HATE SF. I LOVE this completely safe platform. Both are true. Read why here. ;-

    good point. ve vould call dis a love-hate relationship-much like with mama,ya?
    The forum is really helpful, but can be addictive imo. Personally,wish i didn't feel a need to come here. but i do and it helps a lot of other people too, so.
     
  4. ToHelp

    ToHelp Well-Known Member

    Re: I HATE SF. I LOVE this completely safe platform. Both are true. Read why here. ;-

    Holy guacamole!!! It's how *I* happened upon the forum. :D

    I was merely "exploring" the subject.... I don't think at that time I was actively contemplating it. Or hell, maybe I was. Those last two months of the year are rough, rough, rough.

    Diitto, Rojo. Ditto.
     
  5. LILICHIPIE

    LILICHIPIE Well-Known Member

    Re: I HATE SF. I LOVE this completely safe platform. Both are true. Read why here. ;-

    I hate to say this but I; personally; am a part of a "club" I wish I didnt belong
    SF has been a great support and Ive found through many people here -angel; forlorn; ghost;mrclean; alastair aussie; dave among them- have given more than I could have ever hoped for
    I feel for those who didnt have the internet back on time, and thats not so far ago - think early 90s-
     
  6. Alastair

    Alastair Well-Known Member

    Re: I HATE SF. I LOVE this completely safe platform. Both are true. Read why here. ;-

    Yeah...A little bit.

    I like to think that perhaps it does more good than harm though.

    Rage against the dieing of the light.
     
  7. ToHelp

    ToHelp Well-Known Member

    Re: I HATE SF. I LOVE this completely safe platform. Both are true. Read why here. ;-

    Oh, I know, I know. We often take for granted what we have, forgetting that the Internet is VERY young.
     
  8. zoebaby

    zoebaby Well-Known Member

    Re: I HATE SF. I LOVE this completely safe platform. Both are true. Read why here. ;-

    I found this site right before xmas, i get very depressed at xmas. I was looking under suicide, i heard that there was a website, well i dont know if i can say this, if im not supposed to, im sorry, please delete, but I was wanting a sure way to kill myself. instead i have found a place to vent. i can say that i have some emotional issues, that im depressed, having a hard day and people are not going to critisize me, or run away from me. hey maybe i'll even learn how to express myself better, and thats wonderful, and i have learned that im not alone. i do wish the internet was here when i was in wy 20"s, and i had access to this site, those years for me were very hard, but im so glad too be here now!! Thanks to everyone who makes this possible!!!
     
  9. ToHelp

    ToHelp Well-Known Member

    Re: I HATE SF. I LOVE this completely safe platform. Both are true. Read why here. ;-

    Zoebaby welcome. What you said... yeah. That's pretty much the gist, all right.

    See, I also visit a lot of gaming forums (Xbox 360, etc.), and the younger people on these sites... Well, many if not most are just kids--still well-clothed, sheltered, fed, protected (so far) for those "slings and arrows of life."

    Even in their obligatory off-topic areas, you don't dare share emotional issues and really open up, but on SF, you find thousands of others who have been there, are there now, or otherwise directly relate to your own scars, doubts, fears, depression, and the so-called "Uncertainty Principle" on our human scale.

    Thanks for dropping by and sharing this Zoe.

    ToHelp
     
  10. forlorn

    forlorn Staff Alumni

    Re: I HATE SF. I LOVE this completely safe platform. Both are true. Read why here. ;-

    everything in my life has a love- hate relationship so i just dont know. On the plus side im alive everyday and coming back to it.
     
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