I hate shit like this.

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by feathers, Feb 19, 2011.

Thread Status:
Not open for further replies.
  1. feathers

    feathers Well-Known Member

    "Are you thinking about suicide? Thinking about how, if you killed yourself, nobody would care? Think again. If you kill yourself you will change somebodies world. That's right. They will see everything differently. Just hearing your name will burn their mind with memories. They wont be able to go near where you lived, even your town will hold memories. Listening to the radio they'll hear that song, remember, that song you sang with them once? They'll step past your locker every day and wonder why you are not there. Why are you not there??

    Do you want to be responsible for your family members, the people who love you, crying every night? For your sisters or brothers losing part of who they are? Your suicide is going to effect most deeply those who care about you most. That's not right. One of your friends may break down, and just like you, their world will be dark. The pain you are in is awful, but why pass it on to hundreds of people around you, when you could try your hardest to work through it?

    Your family will be paranoid. Suddenly everyone will be talking about them. Do you want to be known as 'the kid who killed themselves?' People you never knew will be crying when they hear what you've done. Yes, they will be effected. Everyone around you will stop and think ;; "was there something i could have done?" Suddenly the people of your world are dying with guilt. All those little hints you gave, they'll remember them. Oh yes, and it will torture them all the time.

    Your friends will think of suicide. Your closest friends are likely to go into a depression like the one that claimed your life. How will they cope, without you? This will break them, for the rest of their lives. And lets not forget the people who will plan your funeral. Your closest friends and family picking out songs for you, photos of you. Crying all the night before, and all the day of your funeral. And all the night after. In fact, they will cry now more than you ever did. Could they have saved you?

    They'll be angry. Oh yes. Why didn't you tell them? They loved you. And now it's too late. They'll be angry with you because they know, they know you could have gotten through it. Then they'll be angry with themselves because they may have been able to save you if only they knew.

    And one day, one day years from now, they'll remember you. They will all still remember you. The girl that sat up the front of your class; she'll remember you. The bus driver you saw every morning; he'll remember you. That little girl you sat with on the bus once, The kid you leant money to at the shop, all your siblings friends, the people that you dont see, but that see you everyday they will all remember you. And every single one of them will wonder; why?

    But imagine your family. You are part of them. Without you, something is missing. If you killed yourself then part of them dies too. They are incomplete. Every family gathering will be missing something. The photos on the wall are suddenly all cold reminders of what you did.

    Who goes through your bedroom? Who cleans out your locker? Who calls the school to tell them one of their students has died? .. Who tells the students? Who calls the funeral directors? Who arranges a coffin for you? Who calls your best friend to tell them you're dead?? Who finds you?

    Please, there are other ways out. I know sometimes the struggle is very, very hard. But it's not worth giving up on life. Life is all we have, life is everything. Its the beautiful moments, and the sad ones. Please, don't give up on all those around you. You can make it through. My teacher said this about her father, who commited suicide: "I understand that the pain is overwhelming, but I will never forgive him for the pain he has caused others. It was just selfish. If you kill yourself you spread the suffering among thousands of people, it doesn't only affect those around you but everyone who has ever come in contact with you."

    Please, keep fighting. You can get through this and see that there is life after what you're facing now. It may be hard, but you'll get there, and when you do you will appreciate it so much more. I understand that most people know that suicide effects others, but please keep this in mind if you're ever feeling so low. Give people the chance to help you."

    I nearly choked up and broke down in tears until I read the sentence "it was just selfish", then suddenly I was just too fucking pissed off to cry.

    K x
  2. absolution

    absolution Forum Buddy

    This made me cry. Like... I'm still crying. :/ And yeah I can see what you mean about the selfish part. And if you think about it, it is selfish. But its not at the same time. Someone who is thinking about suicide can only see the pain they are going through because it is so intense it doesn't allow room for anything else. It doesn't allow room for thinking about how your parents and everyone would feel if you commit suicide. So yes it is and no it isn't selfish. I hope that made sense?
  3. Viro

    Viro Well-Known Member

    I feel like I've read this before, somewhere. Where did you find it?

    And yes, I hate it when people whine about how selfish suicide is.
  4. redemptian

    redemptian Member

    as hard as it might sound the world doesnt only consist of our family. for example your parents might tell you you 're handsome ,you might even know it for a fact that you're handsome, but if the rest of the world, for whatever reason, treat you like crap even though you're a kind person too, you really start wondering what's wrong with me???
    yes people commit suicide cuz things aren't working the way they want'em too is it selfish??? absolutly!!! speaking for me you try everything to make things run the way you want'em, you try different approaches and if that doens't work, you start feeling like everything is out of control and got the impression like you're just a play ball for everyone else. that's when life starting to feel uncomfortable and thoughts like "am i to weak, am i not fit to life..." coming up. is it selfish??? nope you interacted with your enviroment and figured out you were a missmatch.
    you don't kill yourself to hurt people or punish them, you do it because your life has become unbearable and mostly it is a process that takes years. you don't want people to live a life that's so painful to them that they lose their natural fear of death, that they even aren't afraid of eternally burning in hell(if u r religious).
    (english isn't my mother tongue so excuse the bad spelling/grammar)
  5. Chalmers

    Chalmers Well-Known Member

    It is selfish. The problem is that if we only live our lives for others, we're not really living. Until last week I hadn't been really happy in a long time. I had a little success at work, and I thought I could turn the corner. Then Friday afternoon I lost some major business. This business was my fall back income and now if my new ideas don't really work, I'm really screwed financially. I thought that I've spent the last 18 years and I have nothing to show for it. The more rationale part said: it's only money, I have a wife with a job, I have a child who says every day is the best day ever. My problems are with material matters. I might be better if only I had some friends but when you're in your mid to late 40's it's hard to make new friends.
Thread Status:
Not open for further replies.