I have finally given up on my life getting better. I would say most people's problems are due to bad circumstances which are fixable.... but mine, bad genetics and lack of ways to get direction are not. I have known for quite sometime that I am not marriage material. I'm not attractive, I'm not sweet, and I am not good with females. Just not seen "that way". I realize now that close friendships do not exist or long. All my friends have moved, and the one I have left will be getting a job that mandates a lot of traveling. The one thing that used to keep me going was my grades. You may be familiar with how much stock I put into them.. anyway talking to a councilor this semester has shown me that they met nothing and were nothing more then a waste of time. I am at the point where I need to know a major to get any advice... and I have no fucking clue. I used to think my grades would lead me to a career so I would at least have one area to keep me going. The assessment tests have been pretty damned useless but I got one final one to try... procrastinating it till i feel i can take it without being set off. I am a loser with no girlfriend, no career, no future.... I think about committing but different relatives keep coming to mind as reasons not to. they will keep me... I don't want to say going but will keep me alive for now.... but Id b e lieing if i didn't think I wont be dieing by my hand at some point in the very near future. I have no talent, no direction and have tried all that i could to get it. After giving up on so much that most look forward to.... I see nothing left to live for.