My life is a mess, everything is wrong. I was 17 and having a great life when I developed OCD. It was really bad. It started out with washing my hands then moved to the point where my mother had to help me get in and out of bed. I mean it totally crippled me. I'm 24 now and I'm so tried of trying to fix my life! On top of this my education is lacking. I can't seem to learn anything. I have been hitting the books for math over and over and it's nothing is coming to me. I wanted to maybe try college. But maybe I have a learning disability and I'm really retarded and do not realize it? I'm such a leech and hopeless. I wanted a good life but now I messed everything up. I'm so embarrassed and humiliated. Pathetic really, I hate it. I go to a physiologist and all he does is recommend I take more medicine. What he doesn't understand is that before long I'll be 35 and still living the same way! I can't stop thinking about dying and ways out of this life. Everyday I wake up wanting to die. Guys what should I do? I really want to have a life again and not give up. I am so beaten down and feel exhausted of energy.