I have problems in school.

Discussion in 'Welcome' started by euphorium, May 4, 2015.

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  1. euphorium

    euphorium New Member

    Most people, just by taking a quick look at me, can't tell that I have issues with school. I mean I have all honors classes and I'm lively and happy looking at the lunch table, but in all honesty, I'm an utter train wreck. It's just so difficult for me to focus and remember things and my grades are horrible. Everyday I try to remind myself to do homework and schoolwork, but I seldom remember. When I do, I end up getting distracted. My parents call me a liar because of my bad grades. I tell them all the time that I forget, but it's just so hard for what I'm saying to get through to them. I've asked for help, but all they said was to jot down what I had to do. If it was that easy to get rid of how difficult it is for me to remember things and stay focused, I'd be in a better spot right now, but I'm not. The pressure they put on me is also stressing me out. I'm failing some classes and today my mother hit me repeatedly for it and blamed me for all of her stress. Sure, my problem doesn't seem that bad, but I just really want help. Sorry for the long post.
  2. Jabez

    Jabez Well-Known Member

    Hi Euphorium;

    I'm sorry to hear you are having such a hard time. That is certainly a very real problem for a young person to deal with - for anyone to deal with in fact. I hope you can find some of the support you need here. But it is also very important to get some support "in real life" as well.

    No matter what the reason, if your mother hits you that is abuse and NOT YOUR FAULT.
    Whatever the cause of her stress, it is not acceptable for her to deal with it by hitting you. Sure, all parents get a bit stressed out when we see our kids struggling or not achieving as well as we would like, but most parents don't respond with abuse and violence! Constantly putting you down, and even hitting you, is only making things worse not better.
    You deserve to be physically and emotionally safe, no matter what.
    So please, PLEASE find someone you can talk to about this and get some support to be safe.
    Maybe your Mum can get some help, too, to find better ways of dealing with her stress (which I am sure is caused by a lot more than you and your grades!), or maybe you would be safer living somewhere else - with a friend, another family member, even foster care depending on your age and situation...

    Your memory problems are not surprising given the stress and pressure you are under, but they could also be symptoms of depression.
    You are obviously bright, and have been able to achieve at a high standard in the past - doing all honours classes - so this seems to be a change for you.
    Again, I would urge you to talk to someone who can understand and help identify what is going on - stress, abusive home life, depression...
    Is there a school counsellor / psychologist / chaplain you could talk to? A teacher, family member, coach, doctor, or other mature adult who you can trust to take you seriously and work with you to decide on the next step to get help? Or a locally based (same jurisdiction) help line you could call to find out what services and supports are available to you?

    I hope some of this is helpful. I hope you are able to reach out to someone who is close by to walk with you through this difficult time, and give you a real life hug :). In the meantime please keep talking to people here as well, if that is helpful for you.
    And don't worry - your post was not too long at all!

    Thinking of you, and hoping things look better for you very soon.
    Last edited by a moderator: May 4, 2015
  3. darweenian

    darweenian Member

    My brother had this same thing happen to him for about two years during high school; my mom thought it might have been related to a sequence of concussions, but I always thought it had more to do with him being lonely, stressed, depressed, busy, and suffering from growing pains. I send you virtual hugs! You are more than a student - there are valuable parts of you that grades don't assess.

    I suck at school, too (though for different reasons), and I've found that in a lot of ways failure can sometimes be a good, after-the-fact life lesson; it punctured my ego and made me value different things in life a lot more, like beautiful weather and my relationships with family members and qualities in myself that grades don't measure. It also helped me learn how to keep going even though I won't be able to save my grades, to fight hard at the end after a whole quarter of screwing up. I think that's a useful skill, even if it's not a happy one. And that's the end of my know-it-all advice. Again, I wish you virtual hugs.
    Last edited by a moderator: May 5, 2015
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