I have to kill myself

[Fbr27]

I keep imagining scenarios where I would kill myself.

How much blood there would be. How many seconds I would agonize.

It feel like the only conclusion of my life. It feels like the only thing that is real.

Nothing is real. Only death is real.

It is the only solution for my problems, because my problems have to do with the past.

There is no redemption. There is nothing you can do. Everyone will judge you, everyone feel what you are like, and evrybody wants you dead.

 

[Jezah81]

Has a bad event happened to make you feel this way?

 

[Fbr27]

Everything is lost for me.

That's it.

I'm too old, abd a lot of things happened that just make me impossible to get back.

 

[Pebble mouse]

I'm too old, abd a lot of things happened that just make me impossible to get back.

You are only 29. Believe me, you are still very young. I'm not aware of your history and what you have been through, but I truly believe there is hope for everyone. I'm not the same person I was 10 years ago. In 10 years the same will probably be the true for you.

Please stay with us. ((hugs)) friend.

 

[Mysteron Agent]

I remind myself that someone is going to have to clear up the ‘situation’ afterwards and I don’t wish that upon anyone.
Keeping these thoughts at bay is not easy, it requires so much of everything. Listen to @Pebble mouse

 

[Holding my breath]

I keep imagining scenarios where I would kill myself.

How much blood there would be. How many seconds I would agonize.

It feel like the only conclusion of my life. It feels like the only thing that is real.

Nothing is real. Only death is real.

It is the only solution for my problems, because my problems have to do with the past.

There is no redemption. There is nothing you can do. Everyone will judge you, everyone feel what you are like, and evrybody wants you dead.

No need to do anything in the next hour/day/week. Give yourself time and allow the height of the emotion to ease. It is tough right now, but it won’t always feel this raw. Many of us on here have been where you are now, keep sharing here on SF and this family will help you through. Stay strong and keep sharing your thoughts and feelings. We are here for you. Xx

 

[Fbr27]

You are only 29. Believe me, you are still very young. I'm not aware of your history and what you have been through, but I truly believe there is hope for everyone. I'm not the same person I was 10 years ago. In 10 years the same will probably be the true for you.

Please stay with us. ((hugs)) friend.

I don't have any time.

I have to do things now.

 

[LumberJack]

I keep imagining scenarios where I would kill myself.

How much blood there would be. How many seconds I would agonize.

It feel like the only conclusion of my life. It feels like the only thing that is real.

Nothing is real. Only death is real.

It is the only solution for my problems, because my problems have to do with the past.

There is no redemption. There is nothing you can do. Everyone will judge you, everyone feel what you are like, and evrybody wants you dead.

I have felt this way too. But I have often found my negative feelings leading me to invalid conclusions. So I agree with the others that it might be better in time. I can only speak for myself, but I don’t want you dead. I am barely hanging on myself, but when I see it from the perspective of someone else, I start to question my feelings.

 

[alice202]

Everyone here wants you to live. Please reach out for help. Suicide does not end your problems, it ends you.

Your life is precious, and there is nothing that cannot be overcome with the right resources.

Alice

 

[Anchorchain]

I don't have any time.

I have to do things now.

Killing yourself is not something to rush into......it's too permanent for that.
Give yourself some time to improve whatever has gone wrong enough to make it worthwhile to keep living.

 

[Tor]

I can very much relate. I know it’s hard to stay when the intensity of living is turned up so high that you can’t see any other option, besides death. Those thoughts of dying can feel like the only thing that will make it all stop.

I know it may not be easy to see, but people want you here. We want you to stay with us, and we share your pain. We hear and see you.

I know these are just words, and they may not offer much. Please know that you matter and are loved.

 

[AvidFan]

I am sorry you are feeling this way. I am currently feeling the same, but I keep deferring the idea - if I still feel this way in 7 minutes, or 7 hours, or 7 days....then I can maybe act then, or review. I can always get through another half an hour, so sometimes I just take it one half hour at a time. Rooting for you.

 

[Pebble mouse]

but I keep deferring the idea - if I still feel this way in 7 minutes, or 7 hours, or 7 days....then I can maybe act then, or review. I can always get through another half an hour, so sometimes I just take it one half hour at a time

A good, practical idea. Thank you, @AvidFan

 

[Starstream7]

I keep imagining scenarios where I would kill myself.

How much blood there would be. How many seconds I would agonize.

It feel like the only conclusion of my life. It feels like the only thing that is real.

Nothing is real. Only death is real.

It is the only solution for my problems, because my problems have to do with the past.

There is no redemption. There is nothing you can do. Everyone will judge you, everyone feel what you are like, and evrybody wants you dead.

Yup. It's wrongful judgment and ruins redemption, but I'm right there with you.

 

[Holding my breath]

Hi there @Fbr27 , pleased to see you are still around. Keep sharing your feelings with us. We are here to support you. Thinking of you xx

 

[uri]

I just can't stop obsessing about how rich and pretty people are the true winners in life and if you are ugly and poor you are a loser in life and you are worth nothing.

I can't even form friendships because I'm so ugly and no girl ever looks at me because I'm so ugly and pathetic.

 

[snails]

I just can't stop obsessing about how rich and pretty people are the true winners in life and if you are ugly and poor you are a loser in life and you are worth nothing.

I can't even form friendships because I'm so ugly and no girl ever looks at me because I'm so ugly and pathetic.

Are you feeling lonely?

 

[Lifeisthis]

I just can't stop obsessing about how rich and pretty people are the true winners in life and if you are ugly and poor you are a loser in life and you are worth nothing.

I can't even form friendships because I'm so ugly and no girl ever looks at me because I'm so ugly and pathetic.

That's how you see your self doesn't make it true. There's someone out there for everyone