I have to turn somewhere

Discussion in 'Welcome' started by Naphets37, Jul 31, 2012.

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  1. Naphets37

    Naphets37 Member

    Hi. I'm not sure what I should say or how to come across.
    I've been struggling for years now. I have never spoke to anyone about anything and should have turned to somewhere/one sooner.
    The reason I am posting now and choosing to chat here in an anonymous position is that I am scared. I'm scared to talk to someone. But I have got to a point now that I'm scared of what I could (but hope not) to myself. Every day seems to be a little bit more difficult than the last and it hasn't got any better over the years.
    I'm here in the hope that someone might be able to chat with me about stuff and let me know that tomorrow is going to be at least a little better.
    Thank you.
     
  2. Witty_Sarcasm

    Witty_Sarcasm Writer, Musician, Fun Lover, Magic Maker

    Hi Naphets and welcome to SF. You don't need to be scared to talk here, we will listen and help without judgment. You can talk to us and post anytime you want and we will always be here for you.
     
  3. Naphets37

    Naphets37 Member

    Thank you.
    I've been a member on here for a few months. I just didn't know what to say really. I'm not too sure where to start on here.
     
  4. Naphets37

    Naphets37 Member

    Well I thought this would be pointless. Wiping tears away now. I just want to talk to people. The chat function is bad. I chat and my comments end up being buried
     
  5. Acy

    Acy Mama Bear - TLC, Common Sense Staff Member Safety & Support

    Unfortunately, that seems to happen sometimes. I'm sure that when people have started to get to know you, that will pick up a bit. In the meantime, what is on your mind? What specific things have happened in your life to bring you to this point?
     
  6. Naphets37

    Naphets37 Member

    Nothing good is on my mind right now. I try everything I can to TRY to stay positive and to keep my mind off things but I am just overwhelmed with this horrible feeling that shouldn't be here. I honestly feel guilty and take out on myself (not physically) for feeling down. It's a horrible spiral.

    How I have got here? I have been here for years and it's getting worse. I can't even talk to anyone. I am completely alone. My friends have a good idea there is something wrong with me. I try to hide it. I even spoke to one of my friends once. What does he do? Tells everyone under the sun about it. So I have a lot of trust issues as well now. My worst fear is being here in the future. Is it worth putting myself through another 25 years of this
     
  7. Acy

    Acy Mama Bear - TLC, Common Sense Staff Member Safety & Support

    It sounds like a rough, rough time for you right now.

    I know it's hard for you to trust others. I'd recommend therapy if you haven't already got that in place. It is a good way to build up trust in one individual. Other than that, I don't know what to suggest because I don't really know what things have happened to you, and I understand that you might not feel comfortable sharing here yet. If it's easier, you can drop me a PM and we can discuss things in more detail privately.

    I do know that holding everything in and just trying to keep going without ever acknowledging the hurt inside and never being able to talk about it will likely just keep you hurting for longer.

    I hope you can open up a bit here and let us support you. :hug:
     
  8. youRprecious!

    youRprecious! Antiquities Friend

    Hi Naphets, welcome to SF - one of the most caring places on earth I've discovered :) Sorry to hear about your trust being abused - I certainly know how that feels.

    Take as long as you like to start feeling a little more optimistic - it doesn't matter how long it takes, because sometimes we have to hunt for that 'finishing line' that doesn't even seem to be there when we set out - but setting out is the first step, and that is a gr8 achievement, so far :)

    I know exactly what it's like to feel the feelings you've described, and am very willing to talk, or to PM or to arrange a time to Chat here (without burying your comments). "To those who've received much, much will be asked.... " etc. (from the Good Book - and, although it has taken a long time for me to be certain of what I've received - I know that if I did not have it, I would not be here today, and so it's my privilege and delight to accompany and empathise because I know if I can receive it, (it = peace of mind, hope, etc,.) then anyone can, because I thought it was impossible for me. :) And, it gets better each day....... so we can work together to turn your spiral in the opposite direction for you hun :)
     
  9. jimk

    jimk Staff Alumni

    hello Naphets.. welcome.. acy's suggestion of therapy fo ryou sounds like a good step. can be really difficult to get started for sure but can give you some real help with it all.. a good therapist can be like a gift from god.. wise, compassionate and someone who really listens can save one's life..

    do not know much about the different turmoils you are currently going thru.. talking to us about these maybe a good place to continue with.. depression probably, agoraphobia maybe.. lots of experience with these conditions on here.. take care out there.. jim
     
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