I jumped off an 80ft bridge onto a road 3 months ago

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by iain1984, Jul 27, 2011.

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  1. iain1984

    iain1984 New Member

    Three month ago as the title says I jumped off an 80foot bridge onto a quiet road below and lived. It was planned, and I remember getting up and over the railing around it, feeling scared and then slowly going forward until I got a fright - when I slipped.

    A month or so later I was brought round and I was in intensive care. At first I couldnt remember what had happened and the nurses were careful with what they said to me.

    I just got out of hospital on Monday, it was a three month stay.

    Id broken my back in 4 places, neck in 3. Broke lots of ribs, had two collapsed lungs, smashed my left elbow to pieces. Along with snapping both thigh bones, my pelvis and to top it all internal bleeding.

    Now im left with a useless arm thats always sore, back pain and I have to walk using crutches. Ive left myself in such a sorry state. I never for one second thought thst I would surivive jumping off the bridge to tell the tale, but I have and now wish the whole thing never happened as ive screwed up my body for the rest of my life.

    My friends had no idea this was coming, even though I had carefully thought about what to do so that it would work and when to do it. I never wanted to have to face them, and I had to. When I was more with it in intensive care and I kinda came around I could see all the pain and upset I had caused them because they were so happy I could finally talk. I was on life support for just over 4 weeks and at a few times I think it was touch and go.

    I dont know why ive searched and found this forum, sometime now I still think well I should have died and want to. But I know thats stupid, ive managed to convince the shrinks at the hospital when I was in this was a one off and out of the blue, even tho they knew id tried overdosing before as I was found in a coma and admitted this year and had a failed attempt the year before. Once suicidal thoughts have entered my mind I dont think they will ever go away, well at least not until I do. Its kind of always there eating away at the back of my mind, and I dont know why. Im young have lots of friends around me, goodlooking and was fairly fit and mobile before I took the leap at least
     
  2. jkeller4000

    jkeller4000 Well-Known Member

    yeah for some reason doctors at hospitals are not the brightest people,

    lol but i guess that might state it all, they are people, they are exactly like you, they are suicidal, you let yourself out of the hospital, if you left, they thought your well enough to leave, they do not understand some people will never seek appropriate help for themselves,

    you need to talk to someone, some doctor, some real expensive doctor, and admit to yourself you are worth it, the joy of being alive is worth the most expensive doctor!
     
  3. Speedy

    Speedy Staff Alumni

    This is a tragic story. I wish you the best recovery possible and hope you get the support you need (both here and in real life from friends and family).

    Best wishes, and welcome to SF.
     
  4. Stranger1

    Stranger1 Forum Buddy & Antiquities Friend

    Hey Iain, Welcome to the forums..That just shows you that some suicide attempts weren't ment to be.. You have further buisness here in RL..I'm glad you have plenty of support around you..Are you going to get some therapy?? I don't see any harm in it.. They may be able to pull the real reasons out why you want to suicide..Take Care and I hope the pain passes soon..
     
  5. bipolarjoe

    bipolarjoe Active Member

    I am sorry to hear of your attempt. I can't gather the words together to reply. I am happy that you are alive and by sharing your experience your are helping others. Know that you are loved and valuable to your friends. Keep up the fight. I just found this forum as well and am SO GLAD that I did. It is a good place to be. There are so many good people here that are thinking about you and wishing you the best. Thanks for sharing your painful experience.
     
  6. Geminihopes

    Geminihopes Member

    I too am sorry what you went through. I'm glad that you are around to share with us what you went through.
     
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