My bf is the first person I've been able to talk to about my problems and how I feel. But here lately, I just can't. I feel like my problems are worthless and he'll just get annoyed of me talking about the same shit over and over and over again. So I just stopped telling him I'm hearing things and when I see things and what I hear.. how I feel.. all that. I just don't feel important to anyone anymore and I'm so scared I'm about to fall back down. I've built myself up (If that's what you want to call it) and have been able to push everything to the back of my head (Yeah. It's how I deal with things).. But lately it's getting so hard to do so. I'm trying to go to a physiologist, but my mom tells me not to and won't help me because I'll be labeled "crazy" and that the things I hear and see are just "ghost". And part of me doesn't want to go cause I'm worried he'll want to put me in a mental hospital if I tell him how I really feel and how I'm suicidal and how I cut sometimes without realizing it til after. I'm scared of everything, really paranoid, I'm depressed and everything else (or so it seems..) and I just hate trying to fight this. I've been dealing with this alone for years but it's only gotten worse and I'm just so tired. I didn't think it could get any worse, but every time I say that.. it gets worse. I want to be normal. I want to like to do things and just be normal. What do I do? How can I talk to him again? Or anyone? Apparently not talking is pushing me to the edge of a possible lethal hole.