I just cry

Discussion in 'Help Me! I Need to Talk to Someone.' started by Anneinside, Feb 20, 2012.

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  1. Anneinside

    Anneinside Well-Known Member

    On Saturday I had to euthanize my dog, a papillon, named Gypsy. She was almost 14 years. She was peacefully sleeping when she died. I felt horrible. As I write this I cry. When I returned home this morning I called for her. When I wake up in the morning I look for her at her favorite place on the bed. I can't stop thinking about her. She was the sweetest dog I have ever had and the most attached I have ever been to a dog. She watched me all the time, following me from room to room. When I sew she crawls in under the sewing machine table. When I return home she rushes to the door to say hello. At night I would say, "It's time to go to.." and she would race to the bed before I could say the word "bed".

    She had an enlarged heart and cancer. She wasn't in pain and still seemed to enjoy life. I had been out on Saturday morning and when I got home she was just standing there breathing heavily. She would lay down then get up again. She couldn't seem to breathe when she laid down. I took her to the on-call vet and he tried to extract the fluid outside her right lung to relieve her breathing but couldn't get much out. He said there wasn't any choice anymore if I didn't want her to struggle and suffer.

    I miss her so much and I can't stop crying.
  2. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

    Hun you were a good friend too hun you made right choice in allowing your precious pet to go and not suffer anymore. It is okay to cry hun cry as much as you need to I am sorry you lost your wonderful friend In time i know not now i do hope you can find animal to love and care for hugs
  3. Acy

    Acy Mama Bear - TLC, Common Sense Staff Member Safety & Support

    I'm sorry to hear about your dog. :hug: It's hard to lose a good friend and it's normal to grieve such a loss. I'm sure she knew you loved her deeply. Know I'm thinking of you.
  4. may71

    may71 Well-Known Member

    I'm sorry that you lost your dog. I bet that she loved you a lot. You are both lucky to have had each other. Some dogs have mean owners. It sounds like you gave her a lot of love and happiness for her life that was long for a dog.

    You did everything that you could for her. It's hard to say goodbye to someone you love, but you did the right thing. There is no reason to feel guilt. You gave her the happiest life she could have, and I bet she wouldn't have traded you for any other owner.
  5. Anneinside

    Anneinside Well-Known Member

    I want to thank you all for your kind words and thoughts. Yesterday I picked up Gypsy's ashes. The box was so tiny. They put it in a velveteen bag. The same day a card from the vet came in the mail. They enclosed a card with her footprint on it. I am going to find a frame that fits and hang it in my bedroom, her favorite place. I still cry, but not as often.
  6. SmileSarah

    SmileSarah Member

    I spent two years working in a veterinary er... not the place people go when they just need shoots or with minor issues. I saw more than my share of death and loss while working there.

    I know those tears, I've shed them myslef. I've cried not only for my pet when he passed, but I have cried for countless others--some I probably knew for less than a day. the love between a person and their pet is a very real relationship. that pet can sometimes be the only companion in your life who is a constant, and gives unconditional love.

    It takes a strong person to know when it is time to give your pet that last gift of peace. you are a strong person for being able to do that-- there is no shame in your tears. being able to love you pet so much tells me you have a big heart and know how to give love. Don't let that part of you go away. at some point I encourage you to open up your heart to a new pet... there are so many out there that need that love. he or she will never replace you dog, but they will gain so much from your love.

    I'm glad your vet did the paw print for you. I always thought that was one of the most precious last gifts we could give owners.

    there is much love for you out there.
  7. Speedy

    Speedy Staff Alumni

    I am sorry to hear about Gypsy.....my thoughts are with you too. RIP Gypsy :hug:
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