I just don't know how long I can hold on.

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by Atheist Demon, Nov 23, 2008.

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  1. Atheist Demon

    Atheist Demon Account Closed

    Everything is fucked, I have no girlfriend, I am black, I am obese, I can't tell anyone in my family that I am an atheist or that I am bisexual. One of my ex-friends text something racial about Obama, I hate that I have a few friends, and that one of them moved today, and to top it all of, every forum I join, ppl hate me. And that I am Asperger's Symdrome. I wish I had a gun and can end this bullshit. But I am too scared to do it. I wish I had enough balls to go through it. :sad:
  2. Emptysoul

    Emptysoul Well-Known Member

    If you want to kill yourself and like me you just cant go through with it, whats stopping you and holding you back?
    Mabie there is just that glimmer of hope in your subconcious that you are hanging on to for dear life
    If you can just hold on to it, things will eventually start too get better, you cant go downhill forever, you will bounce back at some point, so hold on to that thought with all your strength
  3. Sarah

    Sarah SF Friend & Antiquitie's Friend Staff Alumni

    Hey I have Aspergers too. I think the fact that you havent gone through with it means that you are courageous. it takes more courage to live than to die. I know its hard. Believe me I do. Sometimes everything seems like there is no way anything could change. I think everyone has felt like that at one point. Sometimes it feels like like everyone hates you. I know sometimes when i cant tell what people think about me i feel so bad about myself that i just automatically assume that everything they say means something negative. i dont know if you do that.

    I didnt have any friends for a very long time. i really couldnt relate to anyone. it was hard and lonely. maybe a different point of view would help for you. i look at every one of the friends i have developed in the last couple years as a gift. i think having one good friendship is much better than having a hundred casual friendships. sometimes having just a couple friends is good. even though youre friend moved that doesnt mean you cant still have a friendship with them. the first friends i developed where on this site and live half a world away from me. you can still communicate with yours and talk to them.

    Anyway it may feel bad for you right now but dont forget we are always here for you to talk to.

  4. Stranger1

    Stranger1 Forum Buddy & Antiquities Friend

    Hey Bryant,
    I know there is still alot of racistism in the world. But there are alot on bothsides who have let it go and have made some good friends because of it. I am a straight white male and don't have a racist bone in my body. Hell my grandaughter is Maloto and she is beautiful, smart, and very active. I love her with all my heart!!
    I am sorry your best friend moved away but you can stay in touch through e-mail. Maybe when you get vacation time you can go for a visit? Please don't get down on yourself. You have nothing to be ashamed about!! Take care and STAY SAFE!!~Joseph~
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