I just don't want to live anymore

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by ForgottenLove, Sep 10, 2014.

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  1. ForgottenLove

    ForgottenLove New Member

    I just don't want to live anymore. I don't know what's wrong with me. I can never find anybody to love me unconditionally like I love them. Everybody always ends up leaving me for some reason or another. I don't understand how somebody that claims to love you can hurt you so badly, walk away from you and start a relationship with somebody else right away. How come I'm not capable of doing that? How come i'm not capable of turning my feelings off and just moving on? What does love really mean anymore? Nothing. I'm pathetic and that's why I always get left behind. That's why everybody leaves me. I wear my heart on my sleeve and they stomp on it. I don't want to love anymore. I don't want to hurt anymore. I'll never find anybody that loves and cares about me unconditionally. Unconditional love does not exist and I don't want to live in a world where it doesn't. I am nobody and I serve no purpose. I'm not worthy of being loved and cared about. Nobody has ever really loved me and nobody ever will. I hate myself. The sooner I die, the sooner the pain ends. <- The girl whose always alone.
  2. Viktor

    Viktor Well-Known Member

    Because your heart is on the right place, because you are capable of great and honest love, because your feelings are much deeper than others. And that's why you are better than others and that's why you should love yourself.

    You are like me. People are leaving me... basically because i'm showing "too much" love. Who would have thought it's a bad thing, huh? Well, because it's not a bad thing. Don't lose the idea of what is right, just because many people sees it otherwise. If even every people on the world sees it otherwise, then all of people on the world are wrong and you are right. Even if you are only one. And you are better than everyone else on the planet. Because how precious your feelings are.
  3. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

    You can move on and you will find someone like you who loves more and feels more sensitive people are just that way You will find right partner you will. Stay here and talk to people who do understand you ok hugs
  4. Petal

    Petal SF dreamer Staff Member Safety & Support SF Supporter

    Y'know I am somewhat like that, I have a need to be accepted, always trying so hard to please others, love doesn't come by though.

    I think for now you should put your effort into helping others with all that love inside you, besides I'm sure it would help you feel better.

    Never hate yourself and never give up on yourself. Do not harm yourself. I think you should see a professional to help you cope with all the negative thoughts, suicidal feelings, feelings of being unwanted. All of these need to be addressed and someone we have to admit to ourselves and others that we need some help and there is no shame in that at all.
  5. scaryforest

    scaryforest Banned Member

    maybe they are scared of the amount of attachment you show or maybe they are scared of attachment themselves and float from person to person, it isn't any of you's fault they can't handle you. love yourselves as much as you give love to others.
  6. sine.nomine

    sine.nomine New Member

    I am in much the same boat. I was with a previous girl, to whom I was engaged, for 5 years. She was with someone new barely a week later. Just last week, the woman I thought I would spend the rest of my life with left me. She encouraged me to move on, saying that she certainly would. I simply can't understand how quickly some people can do that. This last case in particular I just can't wrap my mind around for so many reasons that it's of no good to relate. So many times, she told me she was glad of me, wanted to spend the rest of her life with me. I simply can't bear it. I won't bear it.
  7. snogo

    snogo Well-Known Member

    Hi, I feel your pain there. I too don't think anybody will love me unconditionally, except probably my parents.

    Indeed what does love really mean anyway? What is unconditional love?

    You sound like you have been in a few relationships and you have loved unconditionally in all of them. If that's the case, then unconditional love does exist - it's in you. If you cannnot find unconditional love from any other human being, please let it stay in you. Because unconditional love will touch those who are ready to be touched and will go on to touch many more.

    Keep posting.
  8. JmpMster

    JmpMster Have a question? Message Me Staff Member Forum Owner ADMIN

    There is no such thing as unconditional love - not as some people want it. There is fact that no matter what somebody does or what occurs a person may still love that person, but unconditional love does not mean there are not many conditions under which they would move on to somebody (or nothing) else instead of stay. Lots of people getting divorces still love each other but love is not enough to sustain a relationship. As examples , it may be cheating physically or emotionally - they still love the person that cheated but there is too much pain for the relationship to sustain despite love existing. While that is easy, the same may happen anytime there is more pain or sadness or stress involved in a relationship than love can overcome to maintain the relationship. That can even be over smothering and lack of freedom to be themselves on the opposite end of the cheating. I guess the point is that love and unconditional love can be there while people move on to something that includes more happiness for them. I love my ex-wife to this day 20 years after divorcing her but could not have lived with her another day. Love is a series of compromises and when a person can no longer compromise any more love is not enough to sustain a relationship.

    What does any of this matter? Because as the original poster implied they had loved more than one, and other posters talk about more than one relationship, so just because the most recent relationship has not worked is NOT a reason to give up or decide love does not exist. But it may be worth considering how much you are willing to compromise before entering the next relationship - not implying you should compromise more - the opposite- deciding if the person you are willing to enter a relationship with is willing to compromise enough to allow it to sustain.
  9. snogo

    snogo Well-Known Member

    NYJmpMaster's comment is indeed good food for thought. As the context of 'love' being talked about here is mainly about romantic love, what about love between friends, family and even fellow strangers (as in love for fellow human beings)? If love is not enough to sustain a relationship, then what is enough or necessary to sustain a series of compromises which supposedly maintains a relationship? Just trying to see things from a slightly bigger picture so that we don't overlook the interdependent relationships other kinds of human love have with romantic love. As they say, no man/woman is an island by themselves. :)
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