Numb...I feel numb, lost, emotionless, im not able to talk to people. im not worth thier time. i cant come back into chat, people will ask how i am. i dont wanna eat, i dont wanna sleep, i dont want to talk, i dont even want to die at the moment, i just want to...idk, sleep for a few years? other people are worth so much more. other people are thought so much more of than me. ishy n vikki know what im talking about there. its been proved to me. its been proved to me with one person, yet i know its true for the majority of people around here. they are worth so much more than me. are so much better than me. i sit here with my family and they want to talk to me. its too much of an effort to. i just sit and stare. theres only really one person i talk to at the moment. i look at food, and even if im hungry, i just...dont want it. dont want to be bothered. music? reading? tv? food? talking? im not interested. meh, im gonna sound like a bitch here, but i cant even be asked to help people anymore. i get it thrown back at me. i made a point of pm'ing someone in chat earlier and because i basically couldnt magic this persons problems away they got funny about it. wahtever, sort your own stuff out. i want to reach out, i want to cry, scream, shout, talk, TELL people how bad im feeling and try to get better. but i cant. i just cant. it hurts too much to talk. it hurts me and it hurts them. there are other, more worthy people out there, i should just shut up. i have no right to whinge, i dont even have any right to be posting this. im a piece of scum. liar. whinger. attention seeker. weak. useless. i just want this to go away. i need it to go away. when i felt like i was helping people it was okay. i had a reason. now, now im numb.