I just had to get this out (TW)

Discussion in 'Rants, Musings and Ideas' started by S8pxph, Jan 30, 2012.

  1. S8pxph

    S8pxph Active Member

    So I was having an argument with this girl. It was completely civil, no name calling or anything, but kind of heated. But it was just a discussion, nothing mean was said by either party. Well, after it ended, her boyfriend chimed in with, "Wow, this just makes me want to choke [my name] to death. Shut up. I hope you get raped." I'm still seething.

    First of all, I was having a debate with your girlfriend, so you automatically want to kill me? What sense does that make? Way to show wildly unnecessary violence towards women. Does it make you feel like a man to threaten me? Because it shouldn't. It makes you look like scummy, cowardly jerk. And if that comment didn't seem bad, he made sure to finish strong with a rape threat. This was so extremely inappropriate I didn't believe he actually said it for a minute. Nothing I said warranted anything CLOSE to that threat. I hate it when men use it as a scare tactic or display of dominance towards women. No, your stupid freaking comment is not going to make me back down. Your crazy violent response does not scare me, it just makes you look even more like a scummy, cowardly jerk.

    What also pissed me off was his girlfriend didn't even care. They clearly have never had to deal with rape in any way, shape, or form, and their ignorance has made them disgusting humans. My freshman year, my best friend was raped by her boyfriend, and a few months later my boyfriend raped me. So congratulations, you two, you just made a rape threat to someone who is both a secondary and (primary, I suppose?) survivor. You're sheltered, stuck up brats and you need to think before you speak. It's been 5 years since my rape, so this is something that upset me, but it will not traumatize me. God forbid they ever do something like this to someone with a more recent attack. And it just kills me that I can't say anything to them about this because it's not something I'm comfortable sharing with them, so they won't even feel bad about saying that kind of sh*t. They need to go learn to be mature, decent human beings, because, as it stands, they make me sick.

    Anyway, I just needed to rant about this because I'm still angry. It might not seem like a big deal to some, but to me it is.
     
  2. pancake111

    pancake111 Well-Known Member

    If I were you, i would have reacted the same way. I probably would have started screaming at the boyfriend and the girlfriend.

    Your right about how people who haven't experienced rape in any form will use it to as a threat or as a joke. I think the boyfriend said that crap to make himself look tough, like you said.
     
  3. S8pxph

    S8pxph Active Member

    So I responded basically saying that he shouldn't say things like that and learn to be a decent human, and he said, "I am a decent human in my actions, not speech. Oh, and get raped. Anally." And because I wanted him to stop saying such triggering things, I messaged him and explained why it upset me so much. In response he said, "A big shot? No. I feel nothing, not regret or pity or any sort of caring whatsoever. Don't message me, I don't want to read what you have to say, it reeks of boring." Who SAYS that to someone who asks you to please stop being insensitive because you're a survivor and you don't want to continue to be triggered? I'm just so furious and upset and I can't believe a person like that actually exists. Like there is a point where you stop and say, "You're right, that was a dick thing to say. I'm sorry." I haven't been this angry in years. I just don't know what to do with myself. He sounds exactly like my ex and I'm really really freaking out. God.
     
  4. pancake111

    pancake111 Well-Known Member

    I know it's not easy, but don't even pay attention to what he says. You can't make someone suddenly view things as you do. Many people are ignorant and stupid, but you can't get all worked up over it. You're giving him satiisfaction by getting so angry. But I completely understand the anger. It's very justified.