i suffer from depression and anxiety, but haven't taken medication for it in years because it usually makes my depression worse. i've been stuck in an abusive relationship for 9 months and it has emotionally drained me. i live with my boyfriend and he has isolated me from all my friends and i have been really lonely and trapped. to pass the time and get through the day i do drugs but they don't seem to help anymore. i really want to move back home with my mom but she's an alcoholic, and my dad died a few months ago. i really think im at my breaking point.. i can't look people in the eye anymore or walk into any public place without feeling like i'm going to die. i was thinking about getting admitted into an inpatient program or institution but heard they aren't very nice places to be.. i just don't want to do anything i'll regret like hurt myself anymore. i want to get help SO badly and just want to be happy again..