I just relized I have no one to talk to

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by umkulu, Oct 2, 2010.

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  1. umkulu

    umkulu Member


    You know what I think the problem is me not any one else,. Im on the verge of losing my job because i snapted i got tired of all the snide comments all the arogance that some people seem to have,all the people talking behind my back telling stories, In fact im terrified Ive lost my job just because for once i stuck up for my self.

    Its taken this to relize that iam alone thats the stake to the hart

    Im not a bad guy i suffer from deprestion does that mean im not worth the effort does it mean im any less human than the rest,The people who i considered friends just as cold as ice stabed me in the back. perhaps thats whats wrong i would never do that to any one maybe i should start, it seems that what it takes to be human

    Forgive the lack of punctuations im not the smartest of people nor am i good at this writing stuff

    I think I know what I need to do,there is no way i will be able to get another job agraphobia wins that one

    Take care all
  2. hollowvoice

    hollowvoice Senior Member & Antiquities Friend

    umkulu can i just say first off that even though youre from"southampton" and im from portsmouth i bear you no malice!!!!!lol
    you are worth the effort but if the job is making you feel like this maybe the job is not,alot of people get stabbed in the back by their "friends"it just means they wernt real friends at all,but people who will suffer their own falls later in life.
    your image of yourself is obvious your apologising for puntuation nobody cares about that here my friend,
    and your writing seems fine to me
    are you on any meds or seeing anyone for depression and agraphobia?
  3. dreams4life

    dreams4life Well-Known Member

    The main problem is that, we expect great things from other. We all do. We want people to treat us with respect. When they fail to give us that respect, we are put down. It is better not to expect any good from anyone. Then, you would not feel bad at all. Know that all are humans and they can change colors easily.
  4. Noodle

    Noodle Active Member

    I'm abit like the same, i don't trust my friends, if anything they're my enemies because i don't want to trust them.
  5. umkulu

    umkulu Member

    Lol no wories mate not sure you would feel that way if you knew I lived in south afrika for 15 years anyone for rugby lol

    By the way my name is Tim and thankyou for responding

    To be honest mate I think im done, I worked hard covering for them when they needed to go deal with personal issues I listened to there problems I tried to helpin every way i could but in the end they just turned on me,I admit some times the deprestion gets the best of me and no mater how hard i try it just seems that i can do no right, With this resetion one im prety much screwed. It makes me angry After vall ive done for the company the just throw me away like im nothing and it seems my so called friends fell the same way so perhaps it realy is me. Anyway mate all you have is my word for this

    LIke i said thankyou for your response

    oh yeah the meds are citalepram 80 mg and mirtazapine 30mg

    And the thing that makes me angrier is the fact that the manager gave me this dressing down on friday the day before my weeks leave
  6. hollowvoice

    hollowvoice Senior Member & Antiquities Friend

    youre definately better off without the crap job,first has to come your health its more important than anything,sort out the health issues then prove your better than them,and when you leave work for the last time dont get angry just smile and shake your head,
  7. umkulu

    umkulu Member

  8. umkulu

    umkulu Member

    I truly am sory about that, Tust is difficult to give amd I really do appretiated you r situation how ever would it not be nice for frendship to be exacly that friend ship the person or persons you cant talk to about anything with out judgement

    You know what I just rread that back and it sounds like im preaching lol
    But your right I dont think I will be able to trust anyone again
  9. Dave_N

    Dave_N Banned Member

    Hi umkulu. Some people are only our friends as long as we can help them (either financially or emotionally etc.), but when it comes time for them to help us, they are not around. 'A friend in need is a friend indeed.' People like that only take from you, like vampires. I hope that you can keep your job, but if not, then I hope that you can find another job. Don't give up. :hug:
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