I just did something really stupid, I lost more money because I'm a coward. I throw money at people in these situations because I feel I need to pay money to apologise for taking up space on this earth. But someone who just threw away a weeks' rent, when I'm on my way (literally, I'm in a taxi to the airport) to being unemployed and homeless - doesn't that person deserve death? Or harm? I just have this screamimg need to punish myself for my stupidity.