I just want somebody around me to give a damn.

Discussion in 'Rants, Musings and Ideas' started by Pickles_, Mar 5, 2013.

  1. Pickles_

    Pickles_ Member

    I've attempted 24 times in my lifetime. Out of that 24, only 2 were nearly successful. And those were accidents.
    I don't want to kill myself. Well, yeah, I want to die 99 percent of the time, but I sit back and think about my brother, my mom, my dad. And I can't go through with it. I'm too ashamed to straight up admit that I've tried so many times (or at all, even...) to my family. Mostly because...I love them to death, but they just wouldn't get it. I know that sounds overly cliched (YOU WON'T EVER GET ME MOM AND DAD, RAWRRRR ANGST), but it's true. I just want someone around me to realize that I'm not okay (I don't exactly hide it) and give me some glimmer of hope and faith in people and my reason for being on this Earth.
     
  2. Sadeyes

    Sadeyes Staff Alumni

    Hi Pickles and I am so sorry you are feeling this way. Who among the family members you have would be most appropriate to talk to? i am sure they would rather know what is going on and help you than for you to hurt yourself. If I can help process this with you are come up with what to say, please PM me...it is critical that you get the support you need right now
     
  3. livluvphoto

    livluvphoto New Member

    Honestly, I am deeply saddened you feel this way. Life sucks. It does. And nobody can truthfully stand up and say their life is perfect. Nobodies is. Look at me, for example (imagine me, I guess). Young teen who is always laughing and tell jokes. She always smiles and cheers people up. Would you know she is dying inside? Would you know that her dad has been a raging alcoholic for 5 years since she was 9? Would you know that she cries herself to sleep? Would you know that when she says her dad is away for work he is in rehab, only to come back and terrorize her life once more? Never, ever be ashamed of telling anybody this. You are beautiful, and you have time. You're obviously not alright for you to be posting something. But there is something I learned. You are put through this for a reason, a reason to help. A reason to make you stronger. Life is a big test, and most people cheat. But people like you and me, we know what life feels like. How it chews you up and spits you out. We are the ones that studied.

    You are not alone. I wish you the best.