I was supposed to have ECT tomorrow. I put it off from Wednesday so that I could have another treatment just before going on a vacation. I usually start slipping after about 1 1/2 weeks and my trip is 2 weeks long. I wanted to have a treatment as soon before I left as I could so I on Tuesday when I saw my pdoc I said I could wait until Friday for the treatment instead of Wednesday. Then I got the call today that the doctor doing the treatment tomorrow has to cancel!!!!! I don't know why, I don't care why, I just care that it is cancelled. I almost cry when I think about it. I started thinking about SI but I am not doing it because I don't want them to see it on Monday when I am rescheduled for ECT. I started slipping last Friday and the weekend was long. The week was long. This weekend will be long. I think about the days and I just want to sleep through it but I am having trouble sleeping. I don't want to do anything and all I can think about is how I am feeling... depressed, angry, disappointed. I am not angry at me or the doctor, I am angry at the situation. It shouldn't be happening. Doctors are supposed to be there.