I just want to die..

Discussion in 'Help Me! I Need to Talk to Someone.' started by Baldr, May 14, 2012.

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  1. Baldr

    Baldr Moderator Staff Member Safety & Support

    I just want to die..
    I just can't deal with the stress and the suffering anymore..
    My best friend always made it go away but she's not on often enough..
    I just want to die a painful death..
    I hate myself..
     
  2. spidy

    spidy Well-Known Member

    Hang in there mate keep venting here are you seeing a therapist.Find your inner strength great friends here nobody hates you so you shouldnt.Your going through a slump at moment by the sounds of it try to find that inner strength and keep using forum or chat hang in there bud
     
  3. Baldr

    Baldr Moderator Staff Member Safety & Support

    I'm not seeing a professional, I was making progress towards it but I just can't really deal with the added stress of that right now..
    It's not just 'at the moment', it's always really..
     
  4. spidy

    spidy Well-Known Member

    is why a therapist would be good they wont fix you but will help guide you to find your own inner strength and it wont happen in a hour session it will take time.But in seeing these guys you take it at your own pace too as sometimes things can get over whelming
     
  5. Baldr

    Baldr Moderator Staff Member Safety & Support

    I know, but I just can't deal with the stress of arranging that at the moment :(
     
  6. spidy

    spidy Well-Known Member

    You have to have an outlet to vent.Is good you use here so if that works thats great.Last thing is dying so keep venting here if we can help you through we will.Just want you to be safe.
     
  7. Brokengirl123

    Brokengirl123 Well-Known Member

    :( what can we do to help baldr?
     
  8. WildCherry

    WildCherry Staff Member ADMIN

    Is there anything we can do to help? Please keep talking here!
     
  9. Baldr

    Baldr Moderator Staff Member Safety & Support

    I don't know.. I just need something to relax me, take away all the stress and suffering..
     
  10. IV2010

    IV2010 Well-Known Member

    was there anything that helped in the past that you did to relax you?
     
  11. Brokengirl123

    Brokengirl123 Well-Known Member

    Are you on any kind of medication that can help you relax, if not is this an option?

    As IV2010 has asked, is there anything else you can do to help you relax? We could think of some suggestions if not....?

    Please try not to hate yourself too much Baldr. Keep talking.
     
  12. Baldr

    Baldr Moderator Staff Member Safety & Support

    no I don't take any medication, I'm trying to get professional help but it's very hard with the family I have.
    Playing games worked a little bit, and talking to my best friend but she isn't on often.. last time she wasn't on for a month before I saw her again..
     
  13. gloomy

    gloomy Account Closed

    Medication can make things worse… and personally, I think it's an easy but dangerous solution.

    This may sound lame, but if you want to relax, you could try breathing very slowly and deeply… and think about a moment in your life when you were happy, or excited, or when you saw something beautiful, or when you felt happy about yourself. Have you ever meditated before? Try to just focus on one thing or one single sound like 'ommmmmmmm' for as long as you can, and then keep going back to it until you're not thinking about anything else.

    Sometimes it helps to exercise a little too… like if you can do pushups or situps or something. It might not sound like something you want to do, but if you're feeling low sometimes the best way to fight is to exercise your muscles and get your blood flowing… go for a run or even just a long walk and don't stop until you feel better.
     
  14. Baldr

    Baldr Moderator Staff Member Safety & Support

    I sometimes do that, but that's mostly against the frustration.
    Often when I'm down I juts don't have the willpower to, unfortunately.
    Maybe I should try the breathing, but the times I was happy often just make me sad since they're not there at the time.. :\
     
  15. anotherearthplease27

    anotherearthplease27 Well-Known Member

    These sound like great ideas....you could try to just to picture yourself someplace too...lying in a field...etc. I have a picture of a impressionist Normandy beach at the end of my bed...that i can see from where i am laying. i imagine i'm there on the beach...sounds lame but it works...........in my DBT course..the lady running it said if you have a distruptive thought dont fight it but dont dwell on it...think on it and then imagine it floating away like a cloud. you are suppose to concentrate on your breathing in and out first then do this and continue slow relaxed breathing during.
     
  16. Baldr

    Baldr Moderator Staff Member Safety & Support

    I often do that, I often just place myself in a fantasy.
    It works reasonably, but not well enough I'm afraid.
     
  17. Kent

    Kent Member

    Try just a walk. Go outside, walk. Or cook something delicious. Take yourself some work to distract from the bad thoughts.
     
  18. ninnie

    ninnie Member

    Hi Baldr,

    I see that you're Dutch, would it help you to express yourself in Dutch?

    Ik ben ook Nederlands, maar woon niet in Nederland.
    (I'm also Dutch but I don't live in Holland)

    Laat het me weten en hou je goed Vince.
    (Let me know and stay well Vince)
    x
     
  19. Baldr

    Baldr Moderator Staff Member Safety & Support

    I sometimes go cycling, but it only really helps agains the frustration. Also when I'm feeling bad I'm worried I'll just attempt.. heh..
    I am indeed Dutch, but I don't really like talking in Dutch, I prefer English
     
  20. ninnie

    ninnie Member

    That's ok, I thought I'd just offer but realised later that using a language different from English is probably not allowed anyway. Speaking Dutch may be too close for comfort?

    I miss the cycling I did in Holland: it's a great way of getting the wind in your hair, enjoy being outside, use up some energy and at the same time re-charge energy as well.
    I don't know where you stay in Holland but there's bound to be somewhere nice you could cycle to, such as polders, rivers, woods, sea. Always worked for me.

    I hope that you are well today?
     
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